The prohibitionist reflex

From time to time people try to explain to me what is about neighborhood associations and their aversion to liquor licenses. I don't think I'll ever understand it.

The restaurant needs a conditional-use permit from the city — which includes alcohol sales — in order to open on Magazine Street, so the owners held their required Neighborhood Participation Plan meeting May 21. Addressing some of the neighbors’ concerns, the owners said they were looking into the possibility of valet parking, although services such as Lyft and Uber have reduced parking needs.

Some neighbors were also concerned about permanently adding alcohol sales to the building, in the event that the restaurant does not remain at the location.

“We are very concerned about these unanswered questions and others and reiterate our opposition the concern and our opposition to the liquor license being for the building, and not for your specific business,” nearby neighbor Donald Maginnis wrote in a letter a week after the meeting.

Anyway, they're turning Jim Russell Records into a ramen restaurant. Maybe. 

Probably should sell them with frames

I'm an old now so this doesn't really pertain to me.  But, yeah, if I were eligible to obtain an official State Of Louisiana Drinking Certificate, I would definitely get one of those.

HB 409 would require 19 and 20-year-olds to take an alcohol education course to learn about the risks of drinking. After completing the course, the participants would receive a Louisiana Alcohol Consumption Certificate, which would allow them to legally drink in the state.

In all seriousness, our laws regarding certain things are puritanical to the point of self-defeating paranoia. The arbitrary 21 year old drinking age is one of those. 

The market for king cake vodka 2017

Casual observation but it looks like we may have reached a stable equilibrium price at or around $8.00 for a bottle of Taaka. It's the only brand I've been able to find this year so far.



In years previous, higher end competition from Pinnacle and Lucky Player led to a more volatile situation.  This example is from 2013.



Needless to say, we will continue to monitor the situation as the season progresses.

How's my drinking?

Pretty good Gambit article about trying to stay sober and social in New Orleans at the same time. It's written by the imminently quotable Jules Bentley so you get some brilliant passages like this.

I'd always considered people who didn't drink to be psychological cripples, at best uptight or constitutionally weak, at worst deliberately dull: individuals so afraid of themselves they cut themselves off from pleasure, limiting their palette to life's beiges and grays. Five years sober, I find that assessment to have been accurate.

But also there are more earnest perspectives about the challenges of conducting any sort of social or economic commerce where alcohol is an almost omnipresent element.

Still I think it's wrong to suggest that the sober are ostracized in New Orleans. Or at least they aren't shunned with the same harshness that the slightly more than casual drinker might be in some other city.  It's true that  planning any gathering.. be it a festival, political rally, or an academic conference.. involves figuring out where the bar will go.  But if there is a bias in this it is toward unpretentiousness rather than debauchery.

Generally, one can attend most such gatherings without there being much pressure to indulge.  Most often it works they way "Dave" describes here.

My friend Dave, a stalwart of the New Orleans punk scene, is "straight edge" (punkers who abstain from alcohol, tobacco and recreational drugs). He not only doesn't drink alcohol, he doesn't do any drugs at all. With DIY and all-ages venues an endangered species, I wondered how it was being straight edge in a city whose punk shows are so often inside bars.

"At first I probably thought that people noticed [me not drinking] more than they did," Dave said, "but it turns out other people really don't care what you do or don't do. As I've gotten older, I make an active effort to contribute to bars I go to, out of respect for the bartenders and service industry folks. I learned which bars have Abita root beer on tap, which have sparkling water. I always make sure to order something, so I can contribute to the venue and tip the bartender."

Most of the time nobody cares what you're drinking. This becomes more true the drunker they themselves are, in fact.

I've never felt much pressure to be drunk or sober.  As I've gotten older, I've tapered off naturally but that only affects occasions when I can't afford to be wiped out the next day by my old man hangovers.   Not everyone's body, anxieties, social circles, etc. work the same way, of course, so your mileage may have varied. 

Generally, I find I'm more grateful for the semi-casual situations where I'm allowed to drink than for the parties where no one notices if I'm sober.  But on balance what we're talking about here is a wide range of malleable circumstances that exist in New Orleans.  And, to me, that feels like we're mostly getting it right.

Carnival pre-gaming

As of Wednesday afternoon, the above were the prices on King Cake Vodka at your local Rouses.  Parade season hits its stride tonight so now would be a good time to stock up if you're into that sort of thing. Not sure what to tell you about the fact that Rouses is offering 750 ml bottles of Taaka King Cake Vodka for two different prices. Pay whichever one you think is most appropriate, I guess.



If flavored vodkas aren't your thing take comfort in the fact that there are more great locally produced beers available in parade route convenient cans than at any point in my lifetime anyway.

NOLA Brewing has added its Irish Channel Stout to its canned offerings, Tin Roof is selling a nice "coffee porter" specifically branded for parade goers. In recent years, there's been so much Abita Jockamo at my place during parades that I've come to think of it as an essential flavor of carnival.  Despite the wide availability of so much superior product, I'm the most hooked by the fact that Miller Lite is going with the retro labeling.  There's a case of that chilling in the fridge right now.

But there's more to Carnival prep than just stocking up on potables. There's also the question of where one is going to eventually deposit them.  You might be familiar with the popular "Ain't no place to pee" trope. It can become a real issue for residents near the parade route.



This week, the city has been aggressively combating the problem by positioning port-o-lets like these along the Napoleon Avenue neutral ground and at Lee Circle. 



But that's never enough.  Some techies claim to offer an entre-pee-neurial solution via the "Airpnp App." Not sure when that launches, though.

If you do find yourself waiting in line to pee, you'll need something to pass the time.  Sure you can dick around on Twitter but don't forget that Carnival is for people watching.  And to do that properly you'll need a bingo card like the one Gambit has provided here. I'm gonna go ahead and check off the bottom-left corner since that's basically me every year.

J.P. Villere has been writing a version of this rundown of proper Carnival etiquette for a few years now. This one is particularly good.  

(20) Surprise yourself.  Expect anything might happen during a parade; see (17).  Stash a Band aid or three in your wallet or purse just because.  Bring earplugs for you and yours; between sirens and all the bands you may actually want them.  Wear sunscreen; see (13).  Drink less; see (18).  Say please and thank you more.  In other words, in surprising yourself, let Carnival reveal the best of yourself whether marching, masking, or spectating

There's plenty of practical advice in there too.  To that, I would add one thing.  It's a good idea to make sure your bicycle is in working order.  But even on the bike, you'll have trouble navigating a crowd and getting across parade routes.  For the most part, you should be ready to walk.

The weather is looking especially iffy this year so make sure you have a poncho or a raincoat available.  I always go pick up a new pair of waterproof hiking boots just before the first parade.  Makes a big difference.



There's usually just enough tread in them to get me through Jazzfest.  But after that they go in the trash.

I've already got a few miles on them this year thanks to the mess downtown during last Saturday's convergence of Krewe Du Vieux with hosting activities for the NBA All Star Game. We were actually pretty lucky to have parked as near to the quarter as Camp and Julia. We walked alongside a stationary line of frustrated motorists bottled up by the closure of Canal Street to vehicular traffic.  Here are some confused drivers being rerouted onto Common Street.



The upper Quarter was pedestrian only as well which is something that usually happens during the second weekend of parades and sometimes during other special events but not during KDV weekend.  If you can get there, it makes for a nice atmosphere.  This is crap photo of the open Chartres Street but it's the only one I have.



There are people who argue that the Quarter should be pedestrian-only on a permanent basis.  But something about that makes me uncomfortable.  It's fun during Carnival or during other events to shut things down and contribute to the feeling of pause these celebrations lend to ordinary life.  But on most days, the French Quarter is still a living breathing part of the city.



Shutting it down to all but foot traffic all the time feels a little too much like... well,



We were lucky enough to snag a Guide To Dizneylandrieu from a Krewe of SPANK marcher.  SPANK's theme was the evening's clear winner. Uptownmessenger got a hold of a hi-res scan of the guide and published it along with an Owen Courreges column which does a good job of getting at the reason this theme resonated.

There’s a good deal to work with here. Mayor Landrieu’s Disneyfied policies include his proposal for “closing hours” for Jackson Square, signing a law banning certain speech on Bourbon Street, his support (later retracted) for the recently-proposed noise ordinance, his well-publicized enforcement crackdowns on alcoholic beverage outlets and live music venues – the list goes on.

Although obviously to a lesser degree, one could argue that Landrieu is attempting to pull off something akin to Mayor Giuliani’s tenure in New York.

Dizneylandrieu wasn't the only act of cleverness pulled off at KDV, of course.  Other highlights included Krewe of CRAPS' "Gov at Twerk" theme depicting Bobby Jindal as Miley Cyrus.  The float featured a picture of the governor riding a wrecking ball as it battered the state of Louisiana.



Also CRAPS marchers are pretty good at distributing liquor beads, if you know how to ask nicely.



Here's the Krewe of CRUDE's noise ordinance SWAT team.



And this is about 30 seconds of a brass band playing "Cissy Strut" just as the Krewe of Comatose's despoiled wetlands themed "Zombie Fish" float arrives.



For more video, be sure to check out Humid City where Loki has posted the product of his having served as a KDV parade escort while wearing his ridiculous Google robot goggles and bothering people the way he does.  It's pretty good.


Tonight's parades are Oshun followed by Cleopatra... much of which I am probably going to miss because six months ago I bought tickets to see Neutral Milk Hotel without event thinking about the parade schedule.  I'm sure it will be worth it.  It's just that the traffic might make getting there kind of an adventure.  Might try just walking with the parade.

Rolling on

Tucks parade St. Charles Avenue 2010

The Tucks toilet paper ban has been removed from the council's proposed Carnival ordinance. The city council will take up the matter no earlier than January 23.

So. At least that's over with. But hey, isn't now a great time to catch up on the old King Cake Vodka Price index, then? Already there's been movement!



In the space of just a week or so, the Pinnacle brand King Cake Vodka is up one dollar to $9.99. Its entry into the market has the "top shelf" brand Lucky Player at $21.99 which is the lowest price we've ever seen it displayed at.  Taaka remains the bargain at $6.59 for 750ml or $13.79 for the family sized liter bottle. Now might be the time to stock up. 

Carnival Time

The reason the above photo is so blurry is because it was taken in haste a couple weeks ago while I was thinking more about Christmas dinner than I was about Carnival season.  But Rouses, being the forward thinkers they are, have been preparing for some time now.  Especially in the bakery where shoppers have noticed king cakes popping up for months.


December 6, 2013. Feast Of The Pre-Piphany

Because today is the first day of Carnival season, New Orleanians everywhere are following their time-honored tradition of getting on Twitter and yelling at one another about when they are not allowed to eat king cake, where are the places they should not buy a king cake,  what sorts of things are not okay to put on a king cake, and whether or not king cake is really cut out for the rock and roll lifestyle.

Thanks #OneEyedJack for the N'Orleans King Cake! Careful with that knife Jim... mind the baby! pic.twitter.com/XNEbm10TDK
— theBreeders (@thebreeders) December 30, 2013

But whatever your feelings on these divisive issues may be, one thing we should be able to agree on is there are worse ways to handle the chill of a Polar Vortex than turning your sno-ball stand into a temporary bakery.

Can't imagine many people will brave the Vortex for a glimpse of the Phunny Phorty Phellows tonight. Although, I suppose a supply of that disgusting king cake flavored vodka might help with that.

Which brings us back to the blurry photo up top.  It appears that this year Pinnacle has introduced a mid-range offering for the king cake vodka market.  I searched the Pinnacle website for more information. I do not recommend trying this because 1) there is no information about king cake vodka there and 2) viewing that website is like previewing your own king cake vodka hangover.

Since I have (not sure why) made it my business to track such things, I can report that Pinnacle is currently available at Rouses for $8.99.  The low-end brand is Taaka. It was on display for $6.59.  Having been too much in a hurry to even stop and take a decent photo, I can only report that I didn't bother to price the Lucky Player.  In recent years it has been as high as $28.99 a bottle and as low as $24.99

The wide price disparity among gimmick flavored vodkas is especially puzzling given that Taaka actually won a taste test administered by NOLA.com last year. Personally I still recommend none of the above.  If you must ruin your liquor and your stomach with king cake infused vodka at least a little bit this Carnival season, the best and most economical move is to make your own.

Where is this coming from?

A few of us have been asking for several months now about the source of the city's crackdown on go-cups.

I’m at Booty’s in the Bywater, drinking a frozen daiquiri. If I take it outside, I’ll be breaking the law.

The city has recently targeted the go-cup in this neighborhood, making its ban a condition for restaurants opening. More established joints aren’t immune, either – in March, as part of its punishment for music violations, the city stopped St. Roch Tavern from using go-cups.

So far all I've seen is shoulder shrugging. Whenever a city official is quoted, we get, "Go-cups have always been illegal" or some such Orwellian bullcrap. It's obviously a current point of emphasis. It must be someone's idea and that someone must have a reason.  I'd like to hear who and what that is. 

Serpas Signal

Hope everyone in New Orleans for Tales of the Cocktail has had an enjoyable time thus far. Hope you aren't having to do much driving between events.  Especially not tonight. 

The New Orleans Police Department’s Traffic Division will conduct a sobriety checkpoint, in Orleans Parish, on Thursday July 18, 2013, beginning at approximately 9:00 P.M. and will conclude at approximately 5:00 A.M.  Motorists will experience minimal delays and should have the proper documentation available if requested, i.e., proof of insurance, driver’s license, etc. 

Luckily, these days visitors to the newest and hippest downtown watering holes "street food" and craft cocktail driven "blogstaurants"  have all sorts of alternative transportation options. 

We regularly count the number of empty parking spots outside of Booty’s on busy nights. Even with a completely full house, 50 people eating and drinking inside, we consistently count between ten and as high as twenty spots open on the four blocks that Booty’s sits on the corner of. It turns out that the majority of our customers are coming to Booty’s on their feet, on their bikes, and by taxi (Especially astonishing to us, as taxis literally and uniformly refused to drive to Bywater for the year we spent building Booty’s.). Pedicabs and limousines (!!!) have even become frequent fixtures here, dropping off guests, but gridlocked traffic and a dearth of parking spots? Not so much.

Prior to the advent of Booty's (circa 2012) no cabs would ever go to Bywater! That is an amazing fact. Is there a way we can extend this development strategy to other neighborhoods?  What sort of social media based tapas and networking establishment could we build in Algiers that might encourage the next pedi-ferry start-up to go into business?  If I get to Booty's this weekend I'll be sure and ask.  I'm a little short on limo fare right now, unfortunately.  But, hey, free parking, right?

Happy Birthday(?)

It's "State of the City Day." And since we're coming up on another citywide election cycle, expect Mitch to try out an early version of this year's campaign repertoire. Mitch's act is one part Y'at-ish twaddle and one part corporate sloganeering with just a pinch of condescending snark. Get ready to hear his One Voice coming out of your media devices more and more frequently over the next several months. If you can't make it to the show today, The Lens will "live-blog" the event here. There will probably be tweets from various folks as well so tune your dial appropriately.

The Mayor is sure to tout his "NOLA for Life" campaign to advertise the murder rate away. As we noted last week, it has now been six months since the father of "NOLA for Life" criminologist David Kennedy promised we'd see a "real difference" in terms of violent crime within that time frame. It will be interesting to see what statistical contortions the Mayor devises in order to demonstrate such progress.

Also, perhaps not by coincidence... I'm not sure if the State Of The City is just this gimmicky... today is the City of New Orleans' 295th birthday. Someone should ask the Mayor today if he's sure that means our music is old enough to be in the clubs or if anyone is old enough to drink on the street. We already know Jackie Clarkson doesn't think the food is old enough to drive.

One more thing regarding the go-cup issue. Last night (appropriate to the anniversary date, in retrospect) Crescent City Books hosted a talk by historian Lawrence Powell and geographer Richard Campanella. The two authors are responsible for the most widely cited and popular works on local history published recently. Both have new books coming out in the near future. Campanella's, I learned last night, will focus on Bourbon Street in particular. I believe this article is an outtake from that book.

In the course of the discussion last night Campanella dated the "go-cup" phenomenon to the advent of take-out windows on Bourbon Street during the 1970s. This is true insofar as it explains the popularity of drinking in the street on the Bourbon pedestrian mall. But I don't think it's fair to say that, prior to this development, you couldn't walk the neighborhoods with open containers of alcohol. Or at least, you probably weren't likely to be stopped and searched by Chief Serpas on your way home for the corner bar.


 Heh: Just as I'm typing this today it turns out that Campanella  is disputing that May 7 "birthdate"

@drmoore @mayorlandrieu My understanding is that work commenced on New Orleans in late March/early April 1718.May I ask where you got May 7?
— Richard Campanella (@nolacampanella) May 7, 2013

Well, whatever, it's good enough for Wikipedia.  Anyway I'm pretty sure Bienville would have wanted to found the city on the same date that Mitch Landrieu begins his reelection campaign in earnest so why ruin that?

Happy Bithday, New Orleans. Only  290 or so more years to go before you're due for your next Superbowl win.

Carnival interruptus

It's a big responsibility being "the Arthur Hardy for a new generation." But don't worry. There's a complete re-cap of the first weekend's Carnival events coming along soon enough.  In the meantime, enjoy these photos Liprap took from Krewe of 'tit Rex, an event I didn't manage to cross Canal Street and catch myself this year.

Also, as  a follow up to Todd Price's report, I noticed the Taaka brand King Cake Vodka was back down to $5.99 at Rouses this week.  So enjoy that... if such a thing is possible.

The market for king cake vodka

A little more than a week ago we reported on the crucially important matter of the wide variance in prices for competing brands of king cake flavored vodka. At the time, the Lucky Player king cake flavored vodka was running at a full thirteen dollars more than the Taaka king cake flavored vodka.


January 12, 2013: Make yourself ill for either $5.99 or $28.99


This afternoon we noticed the prices have moved already.  Taaka is up sixty cents while Lucky Player has crashed a full four bucks.




Taaka's entry into the market has forced the price of Lucky Player below even last year's price of $26.99 when supplies were so tight that Rouses was imposing rations.



What is the equilibrium price of king cake flavored vodka?  Probably somewhere between a head and stomachache.

You know it's Carnival time when...

The Rex organization is suing somebody.

And then you'll feel better

As is our custom, we walked out and waved at the Phunny Phorty Phellows streetcar on St. Charles Avenue  last Sunday night. And, as you can see above, I took my customary blurry photo of said streetcar.

Here is last year's blurry photo. Here's another one from a few years ago. One year I even got about 15 seconds of dark and blurry video of the Phellows as they passed.  I'm sure there are more in a pile somewhere and I'm sure they're all just as crappy.  But I like these pictures.  I think they convey the brevity and the mystery of the Twelfth Night hint of Carnival quite nicely.. even if this happens entirely by accident.

So as Carnival 2013 begins, here are a few of the mysteries we are pondering.

1) For Sunday night's ride, RTA made special arrangements for the Phellows to travel through a section of track where cross tie replacement work is currently ongoing.  In order to accomplish this, the PPP had to pass us traveling downtown on the normally uptown-bound track.

According to RTA, all work along the route will halt in time for parade season.

Regardless of how it looks now, RTA officials say, the area will be cleared in time for the crowds that will gather for the Krewes of Oshun and Cleopatra, the first parades in Orleans Parish, on Jan. 25.

“The good news is the agency (RTA) was able to negotiate with its contractors a suspension of contract work,” RTA spokeswoman Patrice Mercadel. said

The contractor working on the project has promised to have the site ready for revelers by Jan. 20. Work to complete the project will resume on Ash Wednesday, Mercadel said.

All this talk of clearing the neutral ground in order to make it "ready for revelers" makes this as good a moment as any for us to renew our annual petition to city fathers that they finally enforce the ordinances against excessive use of tents, ladders, and other territorial obstructions which crowd the route in ever increasing magnitudes of obnoxiousness.

So far it looks as though the enforcement priority places the territorial visibility of official NFL sponsors above the comfort and enjoyment of boring old ordinary New Orleanians this season. Oh well. Maybe next year...

2) Mark Moseley's latest Lens column has me imagining all the various online commenters connected to the US Attorney's office hubub as participants in one big Carnival Ball Masque.  Many of them are socially and politically powerful individuals.  They all know each other but they're all anonymous.. sort of.  And, of course, each and every one of them looks utterly ridiculous.

Related:  I share Dambala's "pet peeve" about this business.  I can understand why most normal people will get the terminology wrong.. or not give a shit either way.  But the misuse Dambala is complaining about keeps coming from media professionals who should know better but get it wrong anyway.  Must be on purpose, right?

3) It's January 12 and I haven't had a single slice of king cake yet.  (In fact, we haven't even taken down the Christmas tree but that's beside the point.) However, on a recent trip to Rouses, I did have an opportunity to price this year's "king cake" flavored vodka offerings.


The original imported Lucky Player brand is selling for $28.99.  That's up two bucks from last year's $26.99 which, we thought was so ridiculous at the time that we just resorted to making our own by dropping slices of king cake into shots of Stoli.



Result: It was terrible, of course.  It's king cake vodka, what did you expect?

The new development this year is Taaka has added a king cake flavor to its brand of discount vodkas which you can also buy at Rouses for $5.99.  What could possibly make one king cake flavored vodka 13 whole dollars more horrendous than another king cake flavored vodka?  I hope I never find out.

 

4) Krewe Du Vieux is just one freaking week from now!



We are not ready.  Our unreadiness isn't due so much to the the Super Bowl affected scheduling as it is to technical issues with Yellow Blogging Carnival World Headquarters.  Ordinarily at this time of year we'd be cleaning the place up, stocking up on beer, and getting ready to host parade visitors. But none of that can begin yet since for the last month we've had only intermittent experiences of 21st century indoor plumbing.

This has occasioned a series of visitations from various men purporting to have some knowledge of.. though more likely willingness to do some.. working with "the pipes." After much screaming and telephone messages to the landlord from us and our similarly affected neighbors, an actual professional plumber has been hired to direct the digging of a great hole in the earth.



At least that's what we are told is happening.  We're not entirely ruling out the possibility that we've got a vampire infestation... it is, after all one of the things I hate about this town.  But, for now, let's just assume the plumbers are being up front with us.  So it is hoped that the great hole will ultimately lead to a resolution of our predicament. It is greatly wished that this resolution happens before parades begin.

On the way out yesterday morning I found one of the building super's guys standing in the hole in the sidewalk with a shovel.  Apparently the plumber came out and told them he couldn't do the work because the hole wasn't deep enough. I asked, "So he's coming back out when the hole is deeper?"

"Maybe," says the guy with the shovel.

You decide

Is the problem here that Latoya Cantrell railroaded Marlon Horton's business based on the racist innuendo of Uptown property owners?  Or (if you believe Horton's comment) is it that she had previously offered to support his business in exchange for a political favor? 

Or maybe the problem is that City Council continues in its zealous campaign to wipe any recreation that caters to poorer locals rather than to wealthy tourists?  I really can't figure out what the worst aspect of this is.

Um.. what?

Can they do that?

CPC recommended approval of the zoning change, but subject to 14 provisos, including installing wooden gates along its alleyways, limiting signage, ending music at 2 a.m., prohibiting "go" cups, providing 10 off-street parking spots (by forming agreements with neighboring businesses), and creating a trash abatement program, which Loney said the bar already has coordinated.

Who on the City Planning Commission doesn't like go cups and where are they from? 

Serpas signal

Updated (Holy shit they're messing with us now.. or maybe it's the leap year):

Tonight, the New Orleans Police Department’s Traffic Section will conduct a DWI Checkpoint beginning at approximately 9:00 P.M. and concluding at approximately 5:00 A.M. in the Uptown area. Motorists will experience minimal delays and should have proper documentation, i.e., proof of insurance, and a valid driver’s license if requested.

Thursday March 1, 2012, the New Orleans Police Department’s Traffic Section will conduct a DWI Checkpoint beginning at approximately 9:00 P.M. and concluding at approximately 5:00 A.M. in the Uptown area. Motorists will experience minimal delays and should have proper documentation, i.e., proof of insurance, and a valid driver’s license if requested.

So.. you know.. be smart about your straw placement.

"Upon or around"

Between this and Palmer's curfew we're really moving into some uncomfortable police state territory here.

Under one proposed ordinance, bars could have their licenses suspended or revoked and face fines if people younger than 21 are found "upon or around" their premises, though the proposal does not specify a distance.

And then there was a parade... sort of

If, for whatever reason, you've decided to make Oshun's Friday night procession through Uptown your first ever experience of a Mardi gras parade, don't expect to be blown away. This parade is as bare bones simple as they get. There are about 15 or so floats even the largest of which are light enough to be pulled by pickup trucks and vans. The riders aren't throwing much. Our entire haul tonight consisting of one toy tomahawk plus one frisbee recycled from an Endymion parade is pictured below.



On the other hand, if it's your first time around, there's no better introduction to the basic template than this. Slight crowd, uncomplicated floats, one or two dance teams, and several very good marching bands like Mcdonough 35 here.



The cynic may come away from this parade feeling a bit ripped off but I don't think that's the right attitude to take. Often this time of year we will resort to a cliche which reminds us that Mardi Gras is a marathon, not a sprint. If that's true, then Oshun is only the first quarter mile and all we're trying to do is get our feet moving and find a comfortable pace.

To that end, we decided to go ahead and take the opportunity to experiment a little here in the early going. Earlier, I'd said that I was contemplating making my own king cake flavored vodka on the cheap. Well... yep pretty much.



As you can see, what we've done here is we've broken off a little chunk of plain Rouses king cake and dropped it into a shot glass filled with regular Stolichnaya. That's step one. Step two is... well actually that's pretty much it. What happened next was I just left this on the counter and moved on to drinking Abita Jockamo IPA which is conveniently now available in cans just in time for parade season.



By the way, I don't understand why anyone would want to complain about having a parade in cold weather. I can fit a large number of these cans in my jacket pockets for easy carrying. And, of course, they stay cold longer there in this weather. This is what I took with me on a walk around the neighborhood scouting out parade route food.

The only discovery of note is that Le Viet Cafe near St. Charles and Jackson is offering a $5 breakfast special this year (Eggs, grits, and biscuit or sausage) that I may have to take them up on at some point. Either that or just order the pho which is every bit as effective as a hangover cure.

After the brief walk came the parade, which didn't take long, and then it was back home where the slice of cake had begun to dissolve into that vodka still sitting out in the kitchen. It tasted... sugary... cakey... and only slightly vodka-ey on account of all the sugar having taken the edge off. Not being a fan of any flavored vodkas, I'll defer to Menckles who says it's actually better than the now famous Lucky Player King Cake vodka she tasted a few days ago. I realize that's not saying much.

Anyway if you must do this horrible thing to either your king cake or your vodka this year... and I've got a feeling it will be all the rage... rest assured in the knowledge that it isn't the worst of all possible combinations. This is.



That's a raw oyster and horseradish sauce suspended in a shot of vodka which the good people at Acme are all too happy to sell to any idiot who asks them to. Take it from this idiot, that shit could definitely use a little icing.

This week in Carnival stuff

• The Royal Sonesta Hotel engages in a famous ritual each year where they prepare for the final weekend of Carnival by greasing the poles supporting their Bourbon Steet balcony. The idea.. or really the joke.. behind the ceremony is that this prevents drunken revelers from shimmying up onto the balcony should the spirit direct them to attempt such a thing. But really, the whole thing is done for laughs.
  
  Meanwhile, our tradition of applying fresh signage each year to the library bookdrop just before the first parade crowds gather may be more practical in its purpose, but it has become a similar ritual by which we welcome the season ourselves.
  
  



• Spent Sunday afternoon at the Thoth den party. Thoth's theme this year is "Streets of New Orleans" Expect to see a lot of this logo next weekend.
  
  



• Meanwhile, Menckles had an opportunity to help decorate a few of this year's Zulu coconuts. This one, she says, is an homage to Varg's work.
  
  



• If you're looking for an alternative to Saturday night's Uptown parades, you might check out the shoebox Krewe of 'tit Rex because, if you're pissing off the Rex organization, you're obviously doing something right.
  
  

  In fall 2011, members of the Rex organization contacted the microkrewe about the use of its registered trade name.
  
    "I was shocked and bemused," Yuslum says. "I almost thought I was being punked."
  
    Some of the 'tit Rex founders met with a lawyer from the Rex organization.
  
    "We tried to amicably resolve our concerns with regards to the copyright issue and their use of the name Rex," says King Logan, a spokesman for Rex.
  
    Both sides describe the meetings and correspondence as friendly, and both say they want to find a mutually agreeable solution, but it is unlikely one will be reached before the tiny krewe parades Saturday. Rex offered to license the use of its name to 'tit Rex, but the krewe rejected the offer. Yaslum says the proposal included an admission of copyright infringement and went on to define the small krewe in ways members deemed restrictive. Logan says the offer proposed various points but a legal agreement was not drafted. The group altered its name by replacing the e with a schwa and offered that to Rex officers as a solution.
  
    "We tried to honor what they wanted and maintain the identity of our parade," Schrenk says.
  
    The proposal has not yet been considered by Rex and won't be until after Mardi Gras, Logan says.
  
    In the meantime, the issue has spilled over into the parade. The 2012 theme is "Napoleon Avenue Complex."
  




• Earlier in the week, NOPD met with representatives of Mardi Gras Indian gangs in an effort to reach a better understanding about how the tribes will be treated on Fat Tuesday.

  Chiefs from both sides left the meeting hopeful but circumspect.
  
  “A seed was dropped. And hopefully we can cultivate that seed and watch it grow,” said Big Chief Tyrone Casby of the Mohawk Hunters tribe. Big Chief Darryl Montana from the Yellow Pocahontas nodded. “I feel like we’re getting there. But only time will tell,” he said.
  
  “I think this awareness will pay dividends,” said NOPD 1st District Commander Bobby Norton. “The task is to get every officer to understand the Indian tradition.”
  
  Norton — whose district includes Indian hubs such as St. Bernard, Claiborne and Orleans avenues — is convinced this year will be a good one for Indians, who travel the streets chanting and drumming while visiting places of honor and engaging in elaborate games of hide-and-seek.
  
  Indians have for years complained that police squad cars often vex them by blaring sirens without reason. “We’ve totally said no to that,” Norton said. “No to lights and sirens. No to pushing Indians off the street.”
  
  And if there’s an issue with a tribe, it won’t be resolved by an officer yelling over his intercom. “Officers will get out of the car and go directly to the chief,” Norton said.

  All of this, we've heard before, of course.



• If you're going to the parades this week, keep an eye out for the O.P. Walker Marching Band. Odds are, they're in whatever parade you're watching.
  
  

  O. Perry Walker is taking on a demanding schedule this year. Six of their nine parades will be back to back, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. In spite of all the physical stress inherent in the activity, one student dreads a decidedly different aspect of marching. “It’s tough not stepping in horsepoop because you can’t really see at night. Then your whole night’s messed up until you find some grass.”




• I'm still not in a... um... festive enough mood to blow $27 on a bottle of novelty flavored vodka. But I'm working on ways to make my own in the meantime.
  
  



• Finally, it's starting to look like the weather is clearing up before Oshun gets set to roll. Driving around today, though, I noticed several trucks and scattered equipment which I am told is the Treme crew filming in front of The Columns hotel on St. Charles. If it's not gone by 5:00, I'm calling Parks and Parkways to see if they'll come haul all that shit to the landfill.