The cage is closed but monkey bars are open*

Didn't want Halloween to pass this year without acknowledging the latest episode in the ongoing saga of Tulane's rage monkeys of terror. They got out again this week. 

NEW ORLEANS (WVUE) - A truck carrying lab monkeys from Tulane University’s research center was involved in a wreck Tuesday (Oct. 28) on Interstate 59 near mile marker 117 in Jasper County, Miss., authorities said.

Officials said the monkeys weigh about 40 pounds each, are aggressive toward humans and require personal protective equipment to handle the animals. Three monkeys are believed to be on the loose, authorities said.

Tulane University was notified and sent a team to help retrieve the animals. The Jasper County Sheriff’s Office said three of six escaped primates had been euthanized but three monkeys remained on the loose.

“There are three monkeys still on the loose after the officials from Tulane were able to get inside the truck and get a correct count,” the sheriff’s office said. “Officials from Tulane arrived this evening.”

Tulane issued a statement contradicting a social media post by the sheriff’s office that claimed the monkeys were carrying infectious diseases. 

The response and investigation remain ongoing. 

We here at the old Yellow Blog have been keeping tabs on the Tulane Primate Research Center for decades.  They've got some crafty monkeys there!  The last time I tried re-capped the recorded incidents I'm aware of, it produced this list of escapes occurring in 1997, 1998, 2003, 2005, 2008, and 2018. 

As of the last time I read anything about this latest incident (yesterday) there were still three monkeys on the loose somewhere in Mississippi.  

By the way, when the news of the latest escape broke, I lazily tried to use Google to search for my old posts about the monkeys.  But the heavily enshittified tool made that a lot harder than it needed to be.  I did have to read a comment from its stupid AI stating that "the blog seems to have been dormant for some time."  Is that true?  Sort of, I guess.  I thought I had been doing a decent job writing about the municipal elections... although I guess I did get behind a little bit.  I'm crossposting that on Substack, btw. A concluding installment should be up this week.

But anyway, Happy Halloween. Let's just hope, now that Susan Hutson is no longer running the jail, they won't put her in charge of the primate center... although given the standard there, maybe it's a good fit after all. 

* 

What's in it for her?

Does anyone else find it strange that the mayor of a city purporting to face a budget crisis would go so far out of her way to sabotage a solid source of future revenue already blessed by a court ruling and careful negotiations with high profile concerned parties? It seems strange to me. But here we are. 

Mayor LaToya Cantrell on Monday vetoed $20 million New Orleans had promised for renovations to Charity Hospital, deepening a feud over the city's right to proceeds from a donated swath of oil-rich Louisiana coastline.

The city's $20 million pledge to Tulane University, which plans to turn the long-vacant Depression-era hospital into a new research center, emerged from negotiations over who should receive proceeds from the 38,000-acre plot around Port Fourchon, which is owned by the Wisner Trust. Tulane is one of several legacy recipients of money generated by that land.

Up until this point, the mayor's (illegal, according to the judge) extension of the Wisner Trust granted her wide discretion over the funds to distribute as personal political patronage, even if it deprived the city of a larger pot of revenue overall.  While that's not an ideal situation, it's not hard to understand her motivation to maintain control over the money. But Cantrell won't be the mayor much longer so it's not clear why it matters to her that the office she is vacating maintain control over the smaller pot of money going forward.  

What piece of this story are we missing?  

 

Meanwhile, at Dracula's castle

Nothing is happening and no one is getting paid. 

More than six months after a new development team was brought in to help jumpstart the stalled redevelopment of the former Charity Hospital building in downtown New Orleans, the project remains in limbo with unpaid bills to its architect, contractor and other vendors that total at least $5.7 million.

Public documents show three liens and a lawsuit have been filed against 1532 Tulane Partners, a consortium led by local apartment developer Joseph Stebbins and Israeli financier Yoel Shargian that was awarded the rights to the Tulane Avenue building in 2018. 

The article goes on to itemize the liens but can't get any comments from the firms filing them. The paper did manage to get in touch with ex-NOPD Marlon Defillo who is suing over $190,000 he says the project owes him for "security consulting." He offers up some famous last words here. 

“Each time we would ask for payment, they would say, it’s coming,” said Defillo, a former assistant chief with the New Orleans Police Department. “Believing this is a state-owned building, I thought, how could things go wrong?” 

Anyway, on the last episode of Dracula's Castle back in January, we learned that Tulane had brought in The Domain Companies as a partner. Presumably the object there was to re-jigger the "state-owned building" in a way that placed even more emphasis on private profits from luxury condos and short term rentals than had already crept in. Which is weird since a few blocks away on Poydras, they're moving public entities like the police department into a privately owned building over there. Whatever you gotta do to shake the money out, I guess.

Just get used to it

Apparently that was always the plan.   

On Friday, the carriageway doors to Pat O’Brien’s will swing open again, and staff wearing the bar's traditional emerald green jackets and new face masks will welcome people back to its famous French Quarter courtyard.

Three blocks away at Bayona, chef Susan Spicer and her crew will soon start cooking sherry mustard sweetbreads and smoked duck sandwiches, firing up a culinary gem that's been closed since March.

The two businesses usually have little more in common than proximity in the city's oldest neighborhood. But now they share one compulsion: the need to get open again, somehow. 

“At this point, we just feel like we have to do something,” said Shelly Oechsner Waguespack, president of Pat O’Brien’s.

It's not safer to do any of this now than it was back in March. The virus is still active and as dangerous as ever.  It isn't spreading quite as rapidly because more people are at home by default and when they do go out they are careful about distance and mask wearing.  But distance and mask wearing isn't a solution. It's a way to limit exposure when people have to be out for "essential" purposes.  Going out to have drinks at Pat O's isn't essential. 

It only begins to feel necessary because, despite the federal government's capacity to do so, it has refused to reimburse businesses for their losses or pay workers to stay home.  Although there is no vaccine yet, we could have this thing safely contained by now if the will to take the necessary action had been there. Instead we've chosen to test how much stress the system will bear if we deny people any option but to just go out there and get used to it. 

Now though, Waguespack said a limited return is better than staying closed altogether. With no end to the coronavirus crisis in sight, the business has to find a way to carry on, she said.

That’s a sentiment shared by many across the New Orleans hospitality sector now, especially around the French Quarter, where the shriveled travel business has had a staggering impact.

Who knows how many small businesses will survive the pandemic now?  Back in May a reported 100,000 or more had already been permanently closed nationwide.  It's no surprise that business would slow with customers staying at home. But relief, most notably through the convoluted Paycheck Protection Program, has been elusive. And commercial landlords continue to demand rent. So the squeeze is definitely on.  But since this is a situation that so easily could have been avoided, we have to ask if it is intentional. 

It may be true that a lot of independent businesses are going under now. But consider that also means the economy that emerges at the end of the crisis will be dominated by fewer but much larger firms with deeper pockets. 

The Covid-19 pandemic will likely leave us with an economy in which larger companies play an expanded role, representing a higher share of both employment and revenue. The stock market illustrates the phenomenon: the biggest firms have seen smaller stock market declines, on average, than smaller ones have. It’s the corporate version of the Matthew effect: the strong get stronger.

This shift began before the pandemic came along. From 1995 to 2013, the share of U.S. workers employed by firms with 10,000 or more employees increased to about 28%, from 24%. McKinsey has found that “superstar” firms (whose average revenue is seven times the median) raised their employment share to 30% in 2014-16, from 28% in 1995-97. There’s been much debate over why this is happening, especially the role that higher productivity plays. The International Monetary Fund recently concluded that “technology-driven changes in the structure of many product markets” have made a bigger difference than have individual countries’ regulations or antitrust policies.

The real plum for the oligarchs left standing after the mass burn off of mom-and-pops is the most desperate and compliant workforce in generations. I believe this is by design. I'm running out of ways to say this by now so I'll just repeat the mantra I've been on since March when it became apparent that Congress would refuse to help.  The bosses have won the pandemic.  

It's not just me saying it anymore. A couple of weeks ago, Libby Watson made the case plain in The New Republic.

We’re left to wonder why Washington isn’t doing anything. But why aren’t we doing anything, either? How is it that Mitch McConnell leaves his house without being pelted with rotten tomatoes? How can our leaders, and the people who work for them, continue to show their faces in public? When is the fire going to reach them? What has to give? And why hasn’t it happened yet? One answer may be that the rich, including not just billionaires but the ordinary affluent of America, are not in anywhere near as much peril. And our politics is tuned to their frequency, whatever’s happening to the poor.

She puts an even finer point on it, though. It's not just The Bosses... as in, like, people at the Bezos level... who are coming out on top here, but probably your boss in particular is doing much better than you are by comparison. 

But there’s a divide that’s been more difficult to talk about: The one between Americans earning about the median income or less and Americans who earn two or three times that wage. Life is vastly different for people who earn $30,000 and people who earn $300,000—not on the same scale as the distance between the average American and Jeff Bezos but distinct nonetheless. Life is also significantly different between people who earn $30,000 and people who earn $130,000.

These people are likely to have a good, if not perfect, situation going: They have decent jobs and are probably able to work from home. They have health insurance through their job, which also gives them paid vacation and sick leave. They have retirement accounts, though these might fail the CNBC test. They don’t know what it’s like to apply for Medicaid or low-income housing. They don’t live in food deserts. They can make frequent use of the services provided by our app underclass, getting food, groceries, or whatever they like delivered to their door.

It's been a rough year. But, really, it's only been rough for most of us. Relatively speaking, it's been less rough for a fortunate minority with access to the levers of power. And it's setting up such that the post-pandemic world will be a net plus for that small but politically dominant group. Insofar as it can be said that there has even been a coherent policy response to the pandemic, the purpose of that response has been to protect the position and wealth of the ruling class. Whatever conditions that policy imposes on the rest of us, our only option is to just get used to it.

All of this scales down from the national to the local level.  Maybe your neighborhood bar isn't going to make it through the crisis. But the odds are pretty good that Brennan's will be okay. And, in the same way that the political class in Washington only responds to the needs of the billionaires, so too does the local leadership only care about the local gentry.  Which is why our first reaction to the crisis was deferring Mardi Gras sales tax collections.  It's why we've chosen this moment to turn over land use policy to short term rental executives but hardly lift a finger to stop anyone being evicted from their home. (Besides raising money through a private non-profit scheme to pay landlords, anyway.)   It's why we're going to look the other way as a politically influential private university accelerates the spread of the virus through its own selfish and irresponsible decisions...  Jeff Asher's attempt to cover for those decisions, notwithstanding.

It's why we're sending everyone's kids back to school now too. That's the general reason, anyway.  Specifically, the private schools are open for in-person instruction because they have to demonstrate to tuition-paying parents that they can deliver the exclusive value and sense of social superiority implied in that price tag.  The public schools are motivated by a different version of that prove-your-worth mentality too. But, also, if we're going to force parents to work under dangerous conditions, then we have to tell them they can put their kids somewhere.  

And so there are elaborate plans to make everyone feel like what is happening is normal. Last month OPSB announced the return to in-person learning would be phased in according to grade level. How that makes it any safer is unknown.  But that, plus a number of hygiene theater type measures create just enough of an impression that caution is being exercised. Of course, any of these safety guidelines can be discarded the moment we think they may become inconvenient.  

The NOLA Public Schools district will no longer require a sustained decrease in daily new COVID-19 positive cases to determine how it will reopen for in-person classes. The change is due to expanded testing in local universities, which is expected to lead to a higher daily case count, the district stated in a Thursday afternoon release. 

Up until now, district officials have said they would need to see two or more weeks of fewer than 50 new cases per day and a test positivity rate below five percent to reopen school buildings, a metric that was endorsed by city of New Orleans Health Director Jennifer Avegno.

Now, as schools approach a phased in-person opening beginning Sept. 14, district officials say that has changed. The plan calls for the youngest students to begin first, with older students starting in October. But when officials announced those plans, they said both would be dependent on the data on infections in the city. 

“With large increases in testing it is expected that the number of new cases may increase,” the statement said. “Our focus will remain on the city’s positive test rate and ensuring that it is at or below 5 percent, regardless of the volume of new tests.”

Since the mid-summer spike, the rate of new cases in Louisiana has been in decline.  But that's not the same as saying the thing is under control.  In Orleans, there has even been a bump up over the past week or so.  Still the schools and colleges are set on returning students to class. And with the state preparing to go to Phase 3 of its "reopening" protocol this month, the number of cases is almost certain to rise again. But we're well past the point where anyone is going to make a good faith effort to stop that.  Just be ready to keep getting used to it.

Just get used to it

Months and months of failing to stop the virus, making half-committed efforts to stop it while also undermining those half-committed efforts, refusing to support people through the hardships imposed by the half-committed efforts... eventually the only conclusion to draw is "Just get used to it" was the plan all along.  

Well, we're doing that now. 

Earlier this week, Tulane University professor Carola Wenk got the email she had been dreading: Less than two weeks after the university's ambitious return to in-person instruction, a student in her undergraduate math class had tested positive for coronavirus.

"I just felt heartbroken," Wenk said. "I was just like, "Oh my God, that student caught it now because they came to Tulane."

Such emails have become more common as coronavirus cases have begun to tick up at Tulane, in what some say is the predictable result of the school's decision to reopen campus this fall to 13,600 students, including 4,000 who live in dorms. The majority of students are attending classes in person.

Since July 27, Tulane has reported 155 positive results from its aggressive screening program, which included 14,521 tests. That represents a 1.06 percent testing positivity rate on campus, officials said in a recent update on the school's website.

"Some say" it was a predictable result of calling everyone back to campus. But the university isn't going to take responsibility for that.  They're making a bold decision, after all.  It's a dangerous new world out there. Folks are just gonna have to get used to it. 

Besides, if anything goes wrong, we can always just blame the victims. 

The school will also continue to crack down on students who host gatherings of more than 15 people at a time, currently prohibited on campus.

"We have had to suspend some for violations and will continue to do so if necessary," Strecker said, adding that the "vast majority" of students abide by the rules.

University administrators ought to have a pretty good idea of how students are going to behave.  Setting them up as scapegoats through rules they know are going to be broken shouldn't absolve anyone of the blame for the decision to create the dangerous situation in the first place. 

But the people making the decisions have to weigh the perceived special value of an exclusive private educational experience against these inconvenient little threats to public health so you can see the dilemma. 

It's finally happening

We all knew there would come a day... 

COVINGTON, La. — Live samples of the Coronavirus have officially arrived to the Northshore, where researchers at Tulane's Primate Center will try to find solutions to the virus.

"This is a global health crisis," Dr. Skip Bohm, Chief Veterinary Medical Officer at Tulane National Primate Research Center.

Researches are working to tackle it. A live sample of the Coronavirus was brought to the primate center Wednesday.

This is truly excellent news.  Can't imagine a thing ever going wrong up at the Tulane monkey farm. 

Out of sight out of mind

Justin McMillan is going to Tulane.

Former LSU quarterback Justin McMillan announced on ESPN 104.5 radio in Baton Rouge on Friday morning that he was transferring to Tulane, immediately bolstering a depth-shy position.

McMillan, a fourth-year junior who earned a degree this summer, can play right away and will have two years of eligibility left. Tulane has not officially confirmed his enrollment yet.

It's more and more difficult to be a football fan these days. And there's good reason for that beginning with the mounting medical evidence that the game probably shouldn't be played at all. There are also the myriad political problems. The NFL is a cabal of entitled and rapacious billionaires hoovering up public subsidies, spewing out paid military propaganda, and exploiting female employees in a number of disgusting ways some of which verge on human trafficking. The NCAA is arguably even worse given that it runs entirely on slave labor and arbitrary justice. (That last link has a somewhat happy ending albeit one that only further highlights the absurdity.)

The point is, just paying attention at all weighs heavily on the brain. Not quite as much as actually playing football does but, still, it's a lot to overcome. And yet we continue. Maybe out of habit. Maybe we're the last generation to have been sufficiently acculturated to maintain the cognitive dissonance necessary.  If so, that's probably a good thing. The best outcome may be that all of this dies with us.

For the time being, though, we're still gonna watch. And while that happens, we're still going to point out that LSU went out of its way to block McMillan from transferring to any school it might consider a rival. 

As a condition for his release, McMillan was barred from transferring to another SEC school or any team the Tigers were playing in the next two years.

Which is how he ended up at... Tulane. 

Set the Doomsday Clock to Rage Monkey O'clock

There is an update in the decades-long saga of Tulane University's  mission to bring death to us all via a scientifically engineered monkey-borne pathogen.  Please take a minute from your busy morning of boiling your breathing air for the day and consider the following.

The story stretches back to the 1960s when the Tulane National Primate Research Center opened on a 500 acre plot of land near Covington where it has been making monkeys ill in various ways for science ever since.

Even in its first few decades, research at the center stirred some controversy. In the mid-1980s, activists complained about monkeys at the center being spun at high rates of speed and having their vomiting rated in experiments that were part of the space program. In the late 1980s and early 1990s, concerns were raised over three monkeys that, as part of experiments on spinal cord injuries, had nerves cut that cost them the use of their arms and legs; their brains also were pierced with electrodes.

In addition to spinning the monkeys at high rates of speed, the center also uses them for "basic and applied biomedical research on human health problems using nonhuman primate models." The center's website lists twelve, "diseases we investigate," here. I'm not an expert in microbiology so I'm not sure if any of those twelve relates to this particular bacterium but we do know it was definitely present at the facility in 2015 because...

An animal clinic worker at the Tulane National Primate Research Center in Covington has tested positive for exposure to a potentially deadly bacterium that escaped from a high-security lab at the center and infected several monkeys, officials said Wednesday evening.

The results of blood tests on the worker showed antibodies consistent with exposure to Burkholderia pseudomallei, which is native to southeast Asia and Australia and can cause melioidosis, a potentially fatal disease.

The worker’s blood had barely enough antibodies to trigger a positive result, and further tests are needed to confirm the initial positive reading, according to a statement from the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Confirmation could be received as early as next week.

We also know the center conducts research on Zika and Ebola which we learned from this article last year when the man in charge died suddenly at age 57 after a "brief illness."  That's probably a tragic coincidence, of course, but it's worth keeping in mind that this is definitely a facility where accidents are known to happen.

We've noticed a few of them over the years beginning in 1998 when 24 monkeys ran loose for three days after defeating the security system by "jiggling the lock." 

Twenty-four Indian rhesus monkeys housed at the Tulane Primate Center in St. Tammany Parish escaped on Oct. 18.

All but one of the monkeys were recovered three days later. One female monkey is unaccounted for.

According to Dr. Peter Gerone, director of the Primate Center, the monkeys are housed in a quarter-acre chain-link catch pen that encloses a smaller pen. By jiggling the lock, the monkeys apparently opened the gate which leads from the chain-link catch pen to the outside.

The article about the jiggling incident also notes previous episodes where the monkeys were sprung with a little help from the outside. 

No large escapes involving a number of monkeys have occurred at the center since 1997, and these two previous large escapes were due to vandals cutting the wires of the pen.

There were, "no signs of vandalism," however in 2003 when another two dozen monkeys escaped into the woods.  The emergency crew snapped into action... until they got tired, I guess.

COVINGTON, Louisiana (AP) -- Two dozen monkeys escaped from a research center and holed up in a forest, where animal-control workers used bananas and oranges to try to lure them out.

The monkeys are classified as disease-free and posed no health risk to humans, but workers trying to capture the animals wore protective gowns and gloves as a standard precaution, said Fran Simon, a spokeswoman for the Tulane Regional Primate Center.

By Wednesday, eight of the 24 rhesus macaques remained on the loose.

"When they get hungry enough, they'll come back," Simon said.

Let's assume they got hungry and came back. That's better than getting hungry and going on a deadly rampage, right? Anyway two years later it happened again. I'd love to link to the original story for you but it's not even available via the Wayback Machine. Link rot is going to destroy civilization if the death monkeys don't get us first. The good news is, I've been on this beat long enough to have preserved some of it.

COVINGTON -- More than 50 monkeys escaped from the Tulane Primate Center late Monday evening, leaving authorities with the daunting task of tracking down and catching the animals.

As of 4 p.m. Tuesday, officials said 47 of the monkeys had been captured while 6 managed to continue to elude authorities by hiding in the heavily wooded along Three Rivers Road.

Mike Aertker, spokesman for the Primate Center, said the monkeys were being used solely for breeding purposes, and had not been subjected to experiments of any kind.

"More than 50" this time. If anything, the problem was getting worse. The KATC version of the story (preserved in part here) tells us the monkeys had by this time, in fact, learned to outsmart security protocol.

The monkeys had observed how the cage was opened and closed and apparently used that knowledge to their advantage

Since then, the most notable incident at the facility is the 2015 bacterial containment crisis we mentioned. 

That is until today when we learned that everything is definitely fine.

A WWL listener said he went there this morning. "I went there to make a delivery," he explained. "The lady told me; 'The place is on lockdown, come back in an hour.'"

The delivery man explained that he did notice some unusual activity. "I looked around, and there were police all up and down the street on every corner." He said there were also apparent staff members outside at the center. "There were people in the woods, looking up in the trees." the listener explained. "That made me think they were looking for one of the monkeys."

We called the center and a man who refused to identify himself said, "Everything is fine." When we asked for his name and further information, he said we would have to contact the press office at Tulane and hung up the phone.

Tulane PR later emailed WWL to tell them that one monkey had gotten free but has been rounded up.  How often is everything really this fine up there? We'll probably never know until the day the mutant rage monkeys swarm down to eat our faces which, frankly, might not be the worst thing that could happen at this point.

Time to restart the Doomsday clock

They're about to let Tulane start operating it's Northshore bio-apocalypse monkey farm again.

Officials with the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have reinstated Tulane University’s permit to work with dangerous biological agents, more than a year after the permit was suspended when three monkeys at the university’s Covington-area research center were infected with potentially deadly Burkholderia pseudomallei bacteria.

Tulane announced the reinstatement Monday but said that work with “select agents” — those deemed to pose a potentially grave danger to public or plant health or to animal or plant products — will not resume until officials at the Tulane National Primate Research Center put into place additional safety measures that are still being implemented.

In other words the crisis has passed and we can all once again rest secure in the knowledge that there is officially nothing to see here in Covington. You know, until there is again.  We'll let you know. Trust us.

Long time readers of this here yellow blog might already know that the impending monkey virus disaster is one of the longest running stories we've followed over the years. Prior to last February's bacteria scare, we managed to rescue from link rot three previous instances of monkey security breaches going all the way back to 1998.

There are a lot of ways for it to end for us here in South Louisiana. It's hard to say how likely the monkey borne supervirus is on that list. But just know that it's definitely entered into the sweepstakes.  Adjust your wager accordingly.

Closing up shop at Tulane

Staff buyouts targeting 90- 110. But that's just the beginning.

The cut would amount to a bit less than 2 percent of Tulane’s nearly 5,800 employees. And it would save the university roughly $3 million, part of the school’s goal of closing a deficit that runs between $15 million and $20 million a year on an $850 million budget.

The rest of the necessary savings will come from trimming other operating costs and changes to overtime, sick leave and vacation policies, the university said.

The cuts were outlined in a letter university President Michael Fitts sent to staff and faculty Tuesday morning.

Spokesman Mike Strecker said later that the job cuts will not come from faculty but from among staff members not funded by grant money.

Only the largest employer in the city.  Did you know New Orleans is "booming" in the resilient K10+ times?

Occasional Monkey-borne Apocalypse Update

The Tulane Primate Research center in Covington is going to be the end of all of us one of these days.

At a hastily-called news conference Saturday (Feb.7), a host of parish, state and federal officials announced that a U.S. Department of Agriculture scientist investigating the bacteria that led to the death of a monkey at the center last year had fallen ill and that tests revealed she had the bacteria in her blood. Investigators say it's too early to determine definitively if the scientist became sick as a result of her work at the center or whether she may have been exposed to Burkholderia pseudomallei as a result of her travels.

The bacteria are rarely transmitted from person to person or animal to person. Melioidosis is primarily a tropical climate disease and is widespread in southeast Asia and northern Australia. The bacteria that cause the disease are found in contaminated soil and water and spread to humans and animals through direct contact with the contaminated material, usually through an open cut.

Officials have said there's no reason to believe that the bacteria have spread beyond the primate center and there are no reports of sick individuals at the research facility, which employs about 300 people.

A hastily called press conference alerts the area that they do not need to worry about this thing they would not otherwise have been aware of.  That is very reassuring. Right after having been very frightening.

Anyway, longtime diseased monkey enthusiasts will note that this is not the first such incident by a long shot.  They do have fun at the Tulane monkey house.

What if Camp Calliope showed its Green Wave spirit?

By all accounts last weekend was a sparkling success for fans and neighbors (really more neighbors than fans) of the Tulane football program.  According to Uptown Messenger, the campus and immediate vicinity were transformed into small festival.

The university was successful in coaxing the majority of the game-day mania onto campus, where the main quads designated as official tailgating zones were brimming with Green Wave fans partying under tents with tables laid with all kinds of grilled food, tossing bean bags while bands played on a small stage.

The closest residential street to the stadium, Audubon Boulevard, was the center of much of the opposition to the stadium when it was first announced, but it was largely quiet on Saturday, perhaps even moreso than usual. Tulane fans walked in small groups down the sidewalk toward Willow Street, but virtually no traffic passed on Audubon, where printed signs politely “reminded” against tailgating in the neutral ground.

The corner of Hickory Street and Audubon Boulevard, where the edge of Yulman Stadium rises over the rooftops, had a dozen or so residents and their guests sitting in lawn chairs and grilling on the front porch. The residents — many of whom had moved onto Audubon Boulevard within the last year or so — were pleased with the way the first game unfolded.

“We’re excited about the stadium, but the construction process was tough,” said Audubon Boulevard homeowner Christian Chauvin.

The boulevard was only accessible to residents or their guests with parking passes, with police and parking attendants posted at each entrance to it, in keeping with a promise university officials had made to residents before construction began.

“It’s actually nicer on this street with the game going on,” said Madelaine Feldman, a guest at the gathering near Chauvin’s house.

They put of a few tents, obstructed a few rights of way, pretty much moved their living situations out into the street and had a great time of it.

So why does the city want to shut down all the fun?

The clock is ticking for the residents of a homeless encampment under the Pontchartrain Expressway to pack up their tents and other items.

Hours after homeless advocates held a press conference denouncing Mayor Landrieu and the New Orleans City Council for passing an ordinance last week making such tent cities illegal, a sign taped on an expressway pillar in front of a collection of tents warned of a 72-hour deadline to remove "obstructions" such as tents, tarps, couches and mattresses from the area.

"I really don't have an idea where I'll go," Juston Winfield said Wednesday night (Sept. 10) outside the tent he's been living in for the last month or so under the expressway at Calliope and Camp streets.

Winfield said he saw the sign go up around 7:30 p.m. He and others of the camp,which they dubbed "Camp Jesus Christ," previously lived in a larger camp under the bridge between South Claiborne and St. Charles avenues. The city cleared that camp on Aug. 14, sending its residents either to local shelters or - like Winfield - further toward the river.

"Anywhere I go in this city, I'm breaking the law," he said, just steps from the sign that read, in part: "Any object that obstructs a public place or right of way is prohibited under the law."

"We're breaking the law right now, just standing here," he said.

On the other hand, last weekend's activities suggest that "just standing there" in anticipation of a Tulane football game might be some sort of exception to the law.  So here's what we should do.

I spent a little time fumbling around the Tulane athletic department's "official store."   I can't find any tents with the school logo on them.  That was kind of a surprise to me but I guess they are pretty new to this tailgating business over there.  If you know where I can find a Tulane tent please send that on.

In the meantime, though, you can get these car window flags for only $13.95  a piece.



Here's a lawn chair for $32.98



Maybe throw in a few of these folding tables and garden flags. Then we'll set all that stuff up under the overpass. Suddenly we'll have transformed an unlawful obstruction back into a pleasant tailgate. Is it okay if we bring our own keg?

Already in the spirit

Public forum on the proposed Tulane Stadium takes on the aspect of an actual Tulane football game.

The audience consistently heckled the panel, hissed, and expressed their frustration at the process by throwing up their arms whenever someone acknowledged that a final decision had not yet been reached. Supporters of the stadium were a silent minority, if not completely absent.

Meanwhile, the City Planning Commission has rejected Guidry's IZD which, I think, means the stadium is back on track.

Adding... apparently this is correct. 

Other dates of interest

Public forums for possible Tulane stadium construction.

The forums, which will cover separate topics, will be held June 6, June 18 and July 11 on the Tulane campus. Schematic designs and plans for traffic and parking management, stadium usage and game-day operations will be presented at the forums, Tulane said.

A university statement said a planning consultant “chosen with input from the mayor’s office and neighborhood representatives” will moderate the sessions.

Should be fun. Bring popcorn.

Mothra wins!

Today's highly anticipated showdown in council chambers between two of the city's most privileged power blocks ended in a win for the Uptown Ladies' NIMBY coalition over the Secret Society of University President Illuminati. Ordinarily most of us couldn't care less if these two towering monsters dragged one another back into the depths of the ocean or the pit of the volcano or the Pickwick Club luncheon from which they emerged. But, in this case, the issue at hand was the return of Tulane football to the Tulane campus which even those of us who aren't actual Tulane fans think is a pretty neat idea.  But oh well.

NEW ORLEANS -- Plans for a football stadium on the Tulane University campus hit a snag after an ordinance for an interim zoning district was passed by the City Council.  The district will force to colleges such as Tulane to go before the City Planning Commission before building large-scale projects like a stadium.

The ordinance passed 4-2, with Councilman Jon Johnson and Councilwoman Cynthia Hedge-Morrell in opposition. Councilman Eric Granderson was absent.

Of course this early in the afternoon we're still waiting for a definitive write-up of the meeting to link to.  But, if what we thought we followed along with on Twitter is any indication, the video (soon to be posted here, hopefully) should make for some amusing viewing.

Opening the comedy was all powerful Tulane University President Scott Cowan who read a letter from all powerful Loyola University President Kevin Wildes which complained that these all powerful men who sit on several quasi governmental boards around town were being "discriminated" against through the use of "old style corrupt politics." Watching these University Presidents who are used to calling the shots around town whine so loudly about getting railroaded is pretty funny.  On the other hand, if Scott Cowan is tells you he thinks something is a "back room deal," you should at least understand this is a person who knows what he's talking about.

Next, the Uptown Ladies of Audubon Boulevard were allowed to speak.  They did not disappoint. Attorney and sometime political candidate Jane Booth spoke for them.

Jane Booth asks{rhetorically} how Tulane can build a stadium for 35,000 people 20 ft from a residential "back yard" #nocouncil
— Karen Gadbois (@gadboislensnola) May 3, 2012

Actually the proposed capacity of the stadium is 30,000 but what's another 5,000 kids who won't GET OFF JANE BOOTH'S CLIENTS' LAWN when you really think about it?  Besides, what kind of a crowd are we seriously talking about here?  This is only Tulane football after all. The Ladies are looking at something like 7 or 8 Saturdays of slightly heightened activity near their back yards over the course of each year.

Undoubtedly this is why the opposition included a whisper campaign about the imagined possibility of other events the stadium might conceivably host such as high school football games or concerts of some unspecified sort.  Basically the Uptown Ladies don't like anything that might encourage the kidz to bring their hippity hop into their neighborhood.  Or at least they find the specter of such a thing highly motivational. One wonders if perhaps Tulane had chosen to build a facility for its pilates team the reaction might have been somehow different.

Eventually we got to the part of the meeting where Jackie Clarkson could tell everyone how "insulted" she was that anyone would imply there was something "corrupt" or racially motivated going on.  Shortly afterward all the white members of the council who are owned by the Uptown Ladies associations voted against the stadium. 

It's a shame we'll have to wait that much longer now to find out whether the stadium ever gets approved or if the university will have to come up with a work-around calling it the Tulane Football Reception Hall and Supper Club or something.  I was hoping it would be up and running in time to host such alternative events as, say, a 30,000 attendee Obama rally 20 feet away from the Uptown Ladies' "back yards" but no such luck there.

Update: Ah and now Mitch says he might veto today's action by the Council.  Stay tuned.

Godzilla vs Mothra

If Susan Guidry's Kill-Tulane-Stadium ordinance passes, it might mean that the University Presidents, who sit on all manner of appointed boards around town for some unknown reason, aren't quite as powerful as we thought they were. Anyway, it's pretty funny to see the Presidents, of all people, complain about having been "discriminated against".

Yesterday, a coalition of presidents from Tulane, Loyola and Xavier universities formally opposed Guidry’s motion, claiming the IZD discriminates against universities, though Tulane’s Uptown neighbors respectfully disagree.

Of course it could mean that among the few interests in town more disproportionally powerful than the University Presidents are the members of the Uptown gentry who live along Audubon Boulevard. If it weren't for the fact that I just like the idea of Tulane getting an on-campus football stadium back, I'm not sure which of these monsters I'd most want to root against.

Is Susan Guidry trying to kill the new Tulane Stadium?

City Council agenda item for Thursday May 3:

MOTION - NO. M-12-150 – BY: COUNCILMEMBER GUIDRY Brief: Directing the City Planning Commission to conduct a public hearing to consider an amendment to the text of Article 18 of the Comprehensive Zoning Ordinance No. 4264 M.C.S., as amended, and the designation of such on the corresponding zoning base maps of the City of New Orleans, to consider the establishment of an Interim Zoning District, to prohibit the construction or expansion to existing structures of any building or facility within college and university campuses that will result in a building or facility in excess of 250,000 square feet of gross floor area and will cover a footprint of more than 50,000 square feet within any residential zoning district, in the area generally bounded by: the east bank of the Mississippi River, the Orleans/Jefferson Parish line, Metairie Road, Interstate 10, Norfolk-Southern Railroad track, Orleans Avenue, City Park Avenue, Wisner Boulevard, Interstate 610, Florida Boulevard, the Orleans/St. Bernard Parish line, and the Mississippi River.

Obviously this could affect construction projects in places besides just the Tulane campus but it's quite likely a response to pressure from the folks on Audubon Boulevard.

Update: The pro-stadium side has set up one of those useless internet petition thingys here.

Upperdate:  More here.

Tulane has banded with other local universities to fight a proposal from city council member Susan Guidry that could impede the universities' construction plans including Tulane's proposed on-campus football stadium.

Surprise surprise not at all

Nobody could have predicted that the hospital fight was all about Tulane wanting more control over things and Ochsner wanting a piece of that. Except some of us said so over and over again to no avail but whatever.

Ochsner controls a huge portion of the local hospital market. And while neither side would speak on camera, or confirm or deny whether a deal is in the works, they do say they are each looking at other partnerships.

A statement issued by Tulane says "in the age of health care reform and a changing marketplace, such discussions are common. Tulane said that its conversations with potential partners have been ongoing for years and are only at the fact-finding stage.

Ochsner said it "won't comment on hypothetical business arrangements" but that it "regularly evaluates partnerships and collaborations" as it looks at costs, patient health outcomes and the overall health care system.

The last time a change for Tulane Medical Center was in the news was when Senator David Vitter, State Treasurer John Kennedy and House Speaker Jim Tucker proposed the state abandon plans for part of the new 424-bed teaching hospital (UMC) in favor of a deal with Tulane Medical Center. This afternoon Vitter's office said he has not been involved in the latest Ochsner-Tulane discussions.

David Vitter says he had nothing to do with it. Riiiiight. If you believe that I've got a nice... I don't know let's say slightly used Canal Street real estate... to sell you.

Idiots

The whole concept behind the UMC in the first place was finding a gimmick by which Tulane could force its way into the conversation.

The UMC Corp. was constituted last year, after a long tussle between LSU and Tulane, as a state-affiliated entity whose governing board includes four appointees from Jindal, four from LSU, one from Tulane and two from other schools. The board has management oversight of the hospital -- including determining the size, scope and design of the complex -- with the state responsible for construction.

Vitter characterized Jindal's letter to the board as a victory, though Jindal and Landrieu both said a three-campus model is inherently inefficient. Jindal said his administration's previous, informal conversations about Tulane becoming a more integrated UMC partner would involve closing its downtown hospital and moving its "intellectual capital, its physicians and its patient base" to the new complex. As it stands now, Tulane's primary interest in UMC is placing many of its residency slots there.

Details aside, the senator and the governor agreed on the broader purpose: confirming the UMC board as an independent entity.

"It's the governor making clear that (the board's) mandate isn't to be put into any box by LSU or anyone else," Vitter said.

Jindal added: "There has been a sense that LSU has been aggressively pushing its vision. ... The board shouldn't be limited by anything LSU has done. Their job is not just to kick the tires, but to be an independent body."

Way back at the beginning of this fiasco, we tried to tell the "preservationists" who were holding up the hospital project that all they were doing was Tulane's dirty work. Now, thanks to David Vitter and the NOLA "preservation" movement, they're getting what they want. Tulane gets a huge share of a pile of federal money they were in no way entitled to before this bullshit began and, of course, a larger share of a smaller hospital.

And that's the story of elite New Orleans in a nutshell. Big fish rule the small pond. Meanwhile the city's economy goes stagnant and the neighborhood remains flattened anyway as collateral damage. Maybe some of these big fish will be happy to buy up the cheap land too.

"Like Notre Dame"

Bwah ha ha ha

Tulane was a founding member of the SEC. They left because "the board thought they could make more money as an independent, like Notre Dame."