Saturday, November 29, 2003

Quick Update

I know all two of my regular readers turn here first for their news. While I am proud to serve you I am also too lazy to do so very competently. Here is a quick look at the stuff I sort of paid attention to over the holiday.
1) The awful Medicare bill passed. Look here for what an honest President Bush might have to say about this.
2) The awful energy bill did not pass. This is a good thing.
3) The phony, lying, cynical, smirking, frat boy visited the airport on Thanksgiving. Particularly disgusting in light of the fact that he doesn't attend the funerals of fallen soldiers. Also two high profile Senators on a similar visit actually went to Baghdad. I really don't understand what Bush is trying to say here. Is it "We are making enough progress in Iraq that it is safe enough for the President to visit?" Or is it "The President is such a tough guy that he braved the hazards of a visit to the front lines to be with the troops?" It can't be both... although it will be spun both ways. Also neither can be true given the fact that he didn't feel safe or brave enough to leave the airport.
4) LSU 55 Arkansas 24. The Tigers are now one SEC Championship game away from making the BCS situation very cloudy. I hate the BCS formula. The NYT poll has LSU 9th! Unconscionable.

Wednesday, November 26, 2003

This is flattering.... but weird

It looks like someone has used the links on this page as a template for his/her new blog. Little ol' me!! That's cool.. we like the same stuff. But hey, how 'bout thowing me a link?
(unecessary apostrophes added for humorous affect)

Update: Ha! Ha! I can't read. HIS new blog.. sorry, Richard.

I am not George Washington!!

Aaron likes to take these ridiculous personality quizzes... I think I'm catching the bug myself... thanks, dude. I think my addiction stems from the fact that the results for my quizzes are wildly innaccurate. I am crushed. These unfeeling, web robots simply do not get me! Therefore I'll keep have to keep taking freaking quizzes until one of them passes.

Monday, November 24, 2003

Kitchen Drip Caper

I like to think that I've been generally tolerant of my current living quarters. The folks who live above me have recently invented a sport of some sort that sounds like it involves 1)bowling balls 2) cinder blocks 3)wild cackling. Meanwhile, the next door neighbors are only a few slips down the twelve step ladder from becoming the Shut Up, Little Man guys. I could also mention the daily progress of freaks, crackheads, Jehova's Witnesses, and other such n'er do wells who frequent my doorstep but I'd rather not, thank you.
As I mentioned above, Consuela and I have been pretty understating regarding these issues on account of the following facts: 1)The rent is relatively low for the size and location of the building. 2) No one seems to mind when said rent is late. Oh, and also the umm.. charm. And so everything was fine until last night when God decided it was time to the destroy the kitchen by water.
It began with a drip. Many good things do begin with a drip such as a pot of coffee or an afternoon thunderstorm after a hot August morning. This was not one of them. This was a drip which had journeyed from someplace deep within the sinuses of the building to an exit point in the center of an increasingly convex ceiling tile above my kitchen counter. Curious, I decided to begin an inquiry into the nature of this drip. I opened my investigation by positioning myself atop a barstool, mostly to increase the odds of breaking my neck. From there I began to, scientifically, poke at the tile cyst until, finally, it burst open in a magnificent shower of water and mold and pieces of something... oh and I think a few dead bugs.
Less than amused, I telephoned my slum lord with whom I carried on the following conversation:

"Um, my kitchen just, like, blew up and there's water all over the place and it's still dripping and this is not normal right?"
"Is it dripping or flooding?
"Well, I think the one generally leads to the other."
"Is it dripping or flooding?"
"It's dripping...... menacingly."
"Put a bucket under it and I'll send someone out tomorrow."

And there I was in a soiled and sinking kitchen looking for an adequate bucket. It was about this time that the following sequence of events transpired on my television set.
First and Goal: Deuce McAllister clearly breaks the plain of the goal line. One official signals touchdown only to be overruled by another official whose view of the play was blocked. Jim Haslett decides not to challenge the call.
Second and Goal: Aaron Brooks fumbles the snap, Eagles recover in the endzone. The Saints are doomed yet again.
I did the only thing a rational man could do at this point. I hauled ass to A&P and bought a giant bottle of Merlot.
The dripping continued unabated throughout the afternoon and began to crescend around 9 PM. The increased dripping and new tile buldges prompted yet another stool top investigation (I don't learn very quickly.) This time Consuela and Nurse Mama walked in the door at exactly the right time to witness as I received a second dousing. This time the water was just gushing in. I placed another frantic call to the slum lord who then condescended to dispatch his poor lackey to investigate. When the lackey arrived, the dripping stopped by itself. He didn't know where it came from or if it was coming back. He did know that he couldn't do anything about it until the morning. He went on his way and I spent the next four hours cleaning up. Supposedly he is back in my apartment today, while I'm here complaining. Hopefully, I'll have use of kitchen before it's too late to make oyster dressing.

So that's my day. How are you?

Thursday, November 20, 2003


It's 4:30 am
still working on the term paper

Wednesday, November 19, 2003

Stop me before I blog again!

Lame heading, I know it but that's kind of the point here. I've got a problem. I can't stop posting to this stupid blog. My mind has been completely reformatted to fit the medium and now I can't get it to stop generating posts. And I'm not just talking about the stuff that makes it up here. Everything I read, every project I work on, every meal I eat, every song I hear gets processed in my brain into a few short incoherent sentences designed ideally to introduce a hyperlink or two. Which means, of course, that I can no longer complete a thought. This is Acquired Atttention Deficit Disorder (ADDS) and I can't seem to get it under control. Doesn't the fact that I have one kind of mean that the whole blogging thing is pretty much over anyway? Like the way that the emergence of Stone Temple Pilots signaled the death of grunge. (Not that the whole grunge thing lasted long enough to have a death... was there actually a grunge thing? Or was it just Nirvanna for like two records followed by a series of Pepsi commercials? Who knows? Maybe this is a separate blog entry altogether... see? I'm losing my mind!)
Deep breath... ok I'm fine. Back to freaking out over the unfinished term paper.

Tuesday, November 18, 2003

I'm In A Library, Therefore I Must Blog

And I guess since I'm not in my library the chances of this happening are slightly reduced. But really, now there needs to be a "How Not to Get an Incomplete on Your Term Paper Because of Your Blog" and quickly because time is a wastin' (apostrophe police? help?) Incidentally, right click is disabled on these machines.. totally bogus. If the permalinks don't work, I'll just fix them in the morning. Meanwhile I guess I'll wrap it up here. If only I'd started this a week ago..much like.. If only it rained Hershey's Kisses twice daily. Goodnight, everybody!!

Site of the Day


These folks claim to have created a search mechanism that uses Google search engine API to rank the Presidential candidates based on their association with search keywords. Completely useless, of course, but it sure is gobs o' fun. (proper apostrophe use?) The only thing I learned from this is that Al Sharpton seems to place highly in any search involving food items. Sharpton also is the champion of "pencil" "whistle" and "brioche." Lieberman is the king of "Knack" and "palooka" Kerry wins for "frugal" Bush wins "amphibion" Dean is "chunky" Clark runs first for "laser" and Edwards wins for "edwards" You figure it out.

Monday, November 17, 2003

Welcome to Lib Chron. Now with More Stuff!!

Really, how can I have the word Library in my site name and not alphabetize/catalog my links? And now that there are so many links available here I'd say the re-organization is long overdue. Rest assured there will be more of this in the future. As I've stated previously, the main goal of this blog is universal domination via hyperlink.

Sunday, November 16, 2003

Glad to be wrong

My illustrious career as a prognosticator remains a spectacular failure. All good things here. Blanco is something of a zero but at least she's not a big arrogant phony twerp like Jindal.
Example: Jindal emerged from his room at the Astor Crowne Plaza in New Orleans about 10:20 p.m. to make his concession speech, which did not mention Blanco or include the standard congratulations.
Also it's good to know that the Republican sweep of governorships was stopped in Louisiana. They haven't quite got us figured out yet have they?

Saturday, November 15, 2003

Must Read of the Day

Why I Fucking Hate Weblogs
I must say I couldn't agree more. I've always thought of this as 1) A way to keep a personal record of stuff I find on the web. 2) An easy index of websites that I find useful, entertaining, or informative. 3) A good way for me to remember what I may have been thinking about on a given day. 4) A sub-professional format for logging problems I run into at work and ways they might be solved next time. 5) A convenient way to keep in touch with people who I would otherwise incessantly e-mail news stories to. In other words... yes it's just a bunch of personal bullshit and I am well aware of that fact. However, in the interest of serving the public, I agree to publish the author's suggested disclaimer.

Statement of Audience
I realize that nothing I say matters to anyone else on the entire planet. My opinions are useless and unfocused. I am an expert in nothing. I know nothing. I am confused about almost everything. I cannot, as an individual, ever possibly know everything, or even enough to make editorial commentary on the vast vast majority of things that exist in my world. This is a stupid document; it is meaningless drivel that I do not expect any of the several billion people on my planet to actually read. People who do read my rambling, incoherent dumbfuckery are probably just as confused as I am, if not moreso, as they are looking to my sorry ass for an opinion then they should be outside playing Frisbee with their dog or screwing their life partner or getting a dog or getting a life partner. Anyone who actually takes the time to read my bullshit probably deserves to ingest my fucked up and obviously mistaken opinions on whatever it is that I have written about.

Signed: Jeffrey

Election Day in Louisiana

Can you restrain your enthusiasm? Try harder. Today, our "gret stet" as Earl Long used to say, is faced with an historically annoying choice between the utterly milquetoast Kathleen Blanco and the ultra-Christian nutcase Bobby Jindal. We should all be ashamed of ourselves today. Louisiana politics has historically been known for its tendency towards high theater. We've been blessed (or cursed) over the years with such a colorful sequence of rascals, weirdos, preachers, populists, entertainers, and redeemers to stand for public office that elections in Louisiana have become more than just a civic exercise. Elections, like so many seeming mundane affairs, are here elevated to the status of a street party.. a truly captivating spectator sport.
So this is exactly why this election has been so disappointing. Maybe not Matrix III level disappointment but close.

Some quick observations:

The Times-Picayune continues to be the worst information source this side of a Laffy Taffy wrapper. While the online version seems to have been corrected, the headline in my print copy inaccurately reads, State Will Choose First Female Or First Nonwhite Governor.

Highlight of this entire election cycle came in one of the final debates when Ms. Blanco, in mid-response, forgot the question.

Reasons not to vote for Jindal: Well I've mentioned them here and here. But the short version is 1) He believes he has personally confronted Satan. 2) He wants to teach creationism in public schools. 3) He used to work in the Bush Administration. 4) He and his wife have a covenant marriage. 5) All of this is downright nutty.

Reasons to vote for Blanco: She is not Bobby Jindal

Election links
1)Online Guide to Louisiana Politics
2)Polling locations

Suggested Reading on Louisiana Politics
Earl of Louisiana by AJ Liebling Liebling's observations about the '56 Gubenatorial election are among the most astute from any outside observer. His comparison of New Orleans speech patterns to those of Hoboken, New Jersey is a featured quote in most printings of A Confederacy of Dunces.

Huey Long by T. Harry Williams Best Kingfish biography available.

Cross to Bear and The Last Hayride by John Maginnis ably cover the career of Edwin Edwards, Louisiana's last great populist (and scoudrel but we like that here) as well as his epic race against white supremacist, David Duke.

Prediction Jindal... probably in something of a rout.

Go vote!

Update: Absolute must-read Salon feature on Edwards.

Thursday, November 13, 2003

Oh and by the way

We're all gonna die

This must be why I'm so dizzy lately.

Hey, Caro

Ewwwww gross!

What Risks Are Involved in Tattooing?
The following are the primary complications that can result from tattooing:

Infection. Unsterile tattooing equipment and needles can transmit infectious diseases,such as hepatitis. The risk of infection is the reason the American Association of Blood Banks requires a one-year wait between getting a tattoo and donating blood.
It is extremely important to make sure that all tattooing equipment is clean and sterilized before use. Even if the needles are sterilized or never have been used, it is important to understand that in some cases the equipment that holds the needles cannot be sterilized reliably due to its design. In addition, the person who receives a tattoo must be sure to care for the tattooed area properly during the first week or so after the pigments are injected.

Removal problems. Despite advances in laser technology, removing a tattoo is a painstaking process, usually involving several treatments and considerable expense. Complete removal without scarring may be impossible. See "The Most Common Problem: Dissatisfaction" and "Removal Techniques," below.

Allergic reactions.Although allergic reactions to tattoo pigments are rare, when they happen they may be particularly troublesome because the pigments can be hard to remove. Occasionally, people may develop an allergic reaction to tattoos they have had for years.

Granulomas.These are nodules that may form around material that the body perceives as foreign, such as particles of tattoo pigment.

Keloid formation. If you are prone to developing keloids -- scars that grow beyond normal boundaries -- you are at risk of keloid formation from a tattoo. Keloids may form any time you injure or traumatize your skin, and according to Office of Cosmetics and Colors (OCAC) dermatologist Ella Toombs, M.D., tattooing or micropigmentation is a form of trauma. Micropigmentation: State of the Art, a book written by Charles Zwerling, M.D., Annette Walker, R.N., and Norman Goldstein, M.D., states that keloids occur more frequently as a consequence of tattoo removal.

MRI complications. There have been reports of people with tattoos or permanent makeup who experienced swelling or burning in the affected areas when they underwent magnetic resonance imaging (MRI). This seems to occur only rarely and apparently without lasting effects.

There also have been reports of tattoo pigments interfering with the quality of the image. This seems to occur mainly when a person with permanent eyeliner undergoes MRI of the eyes. Mascara may produce a similar effect. The difference is that mascara is easily removable.

The cause of these complications is uncertain. Some have theorized that they result from an interaction with the metallic components of some pigments.

However, the risks of avoiding an MRI when your doctor has recommended one are likely to be much greater than the risks of complications from an interaction between the MRI and tattoo or permanent makeup. Instead of avoiding an MRI, individuals who have tattoos or permanent makeup should inform the radiologist or technician of this fact in order to take appropriate precautions, avoid complications, and assure the best results.

From: FDA fact sheet

Uplifting Story of the Morning


COLUMBUS, Ga. (AP) - Four soldiers at Fort Benning have been arrested and accused of stabbing to death a member of their infantry unit, setting the body on fire and leaving it in the woods just days after their return from Iraq.

Police said the soldiers had gotten mad at Spc. Richard R. Davis for insulting a dancer at a strip club and getting them kicked out of the place.

Davis, 24, of St. Charles, Mo., was stabbed repeatedly in July. His skeletal remains were found Friday, nearly four months after he was reported missing. Fort Benning investigators had received a tip to search the woods near the Army post.

Now I know you want to talk about post-traumatic stress and so forth at this point, but first let me suggest that there is something much worse going on. For example this.

Lariam is the drug that at least two of the soldiers who killed their wives at Fort Bragg last summer took while serving in Afghanistan. Both those soldiers - and a third who apparently had taken the drug - subsequently killed themselves. The drug's label warns of psychosis, aggression, hallucinations and reports of suicide that can occur "long after" someone stops taking it. The Food and Drug Administration this year ordered that everyone prescribed the drug be handed a written statement listing those dangers and warning them to quit taking it if they experience mental problems.

So here we have yet another cost of the war. These kids are used by a military establishment with no qualms about giving them whatever freaking pill they think might help them blow stuff up regardless of the consequences.

Hell... they even did it to Elvis.

This Morning

Angst pure and unadulterated.

You really wanted to know that.

Tuesday, November 11, 2003

Gobble Gobble

Ok I know it's early in the month, but we're beginning to decorate the library for Thanksgiving and ... well this stuff is on my mind. This year I'd like our display to provide a little more info than the usual banal collection of recipes and pictures of Pilgrims and whatnot. I'm thinking about posting this excellent essay by James Loewen. Here is an excerpt:

Thanksgiving is full of embarrassing facts. The Pilgrims did not introduce the Native Americans to the tradition; Eastern Indians had observed autumnal harvest celebrations for centuries. Our modern celebrations date back only to 1863; not until the 1890s did the Pilgrims get included in the tradition; no one even called them "Pilgrims" until the 1870s. Plymouth Rock achieved ichnographic status only in the nineteenth century, when some enterprising residents of the town moved it down to the water so its significance as the "holy soil" the Pilgrims first touched might seem more plausible. The Rock has become a shrine, the Mayflower Compact a sacred text, and our textbooks play the same function as the Anglican BOOK OF COMMON PRAYER, teaching us the rudiments of the civil religion of Thanksgiving.

Indians are marginalized in this civic ritual. Our archetypal image of the first Thanksgiving portrays the groaning boards in the woods, with the Pilgrims in their starched Sunday best and the almost naked Indian guests. Thanksgiving silliness reaches some sort of zenith in the handouts that school children have carried home for decades, with captions like, "They served pumpkins and turkeys and corn and squash. The Indians had never seen such a feast!" When his son brought home this "information" from his New Hampshire elementary school, Native American novelist Michael Dorris pointed out "the Pilgrims had literally never seen `such a feast,' since all foods mentioned are exclusively indigenous to the Americas and had been provided by [or with the aid of] the local tribe."

I would be remiss if I did not also recommend Loewen's book, Lies My Teacher Told Me, which is about the sorry state of elementary and high school history textbooks.

I would also be remiss if I wrote a post about Thanksgiving which did not include at least one recipe for oyster dressing.... not as good as my mom's of course.

Monday, November 10, 2003

A Rose by any other name...

Doesn't smell too sweet in a tranfer tube I imagine. How many more transfers will there be?

So there!

I have once again been put in the very familiar position of having to defend my personal lifestyle choices via lazy documentation. The answer is yes you can put green onions in your mac and cheese you big meanie! Among lots of other stuff apparently. So shut up and eat it already. Christ!

don't get it?
don't care.

Well, Here We Go

When the US Congress passed the USA PATRIOT act in a truly childish fit of panic one month after Sept 11, the rationale, we were told, was that law enforcement needed a mechanism by which it could subvert the Bill of Rights in order to conduct more effective investigations of suspected terrorists. Surely loyal Americans had nothing to fear from the new intrusive government powers. Two years later how much safer so you feel knowing that the FBI has been using its new powers to protect us from strip club owners who bribe politicians? You may be asking yourself, "What does this have to do with fighting terrorism?" You may be correctly responding to your own query, "Nothing, dimwit, now quit asking me these lame questions." A Justice Department spokesman quoted in the story offers an explanation that likely comes as news to the public at large as well as to most of the legislators who voted for the PATRIOT act,
"The Patriot Act was not meant to be just for terrorism," Corallo said. "A lot of the uninformed criticism was obviously misplaced."
Hope you guys sleep well tonight.

Saturday, November 08, 2003

Gotta keep this circulating

What the hell kind of freedom are they supposed to be protecting anyway?

link via atrios here.

Today, Herr Director Says

How many librarians does it take to change a lightbulb?

None.. they can't afford one.


Very Timely Information

It has come to my attention lately that some people's dogs do not endure auto travel so well. Some people's dogs do not sit still so well, or refrain from eating shoes, cats, fingers, small children, etc. so well either but we can't solve all the world's problems in one day can we?
The carsickness issue, has been thankfully addressed by Tom and Ray. I suggest some people check it out.

Demons Out!!

I have been exasperating myself trying to convince people that Bobby Jindal is not a progressive candidate for governor and is in fact a rather dangerous fanatical christian lunatic. No one wants to listen. The local media is absolutely in love with him.. mostly because of his age.. but also because he is part of this new phenomenon of establishment conservatives who can sell themselves as reformers based mostly on TV charisma. I'm not at all surprised that he picked up the Nagin endorsement. Nagin shares much of Jindal's phoniness and anti-working class agenda. Now it turns out, that Jindal believes himself to have actually confronted a demonic possession. I wonder how much play this story will get locally... if any.

Thursday, November 06, 2003

Getting a little nervous here

My site meter is down and I don't know why. MUST HAVE STATISTICS.... Arggh!

Update: Ok that's better... tantrum over.

Diebold Scheme in NYT

Pulled this link off of explodedlibrary where there is much much more on this subject.

It's good to see this finally get into the times. I think there are two major issues to be concerned with here.

1) Copyright law is, to an increasing degree, being used as a tool of suppression of free speech.

Legal scholars say that the online protest and the use of copyright law by Diebold have broad implications and show that the copyright wars are about more than whether Britney Spears gets royalties from downloaded songs. "We?re so focused on the microview whether EMI is going to make a buck next year but there is so much more at stake in our battle to control the flows of information,? including issues at the core of free speech and democracy itself," said Siva Vaidhyanathan, a professor in the department of culture and communication at New York University.

Indeed, while the news media tends to cast most of its attention toward the rather benign entertainment aspects of copyright law, abuses of this law in which the powerful use it as an intimidation tool go relatively unnoticed. Two recent instances of such abuse, have been perpetrated by Verizon against its employees and, more famously by Fox against Al Franken.

2) The most fundamental stone on which a functioning democracy is built, your right to vote, is under assault and this issue needs to be brought out into the open.

Read more:
Bev Harris explains exactly what is so insidious about the Diebold machine.
Greg Palast on why we shouldn't blindly trust public officials with stewardship of our right to vote.
Josh Marshall on the same issue.

Wednesday, November 05, 2003

God Damn Times-Pic Movie Guy Stole My Line

See review from a thieving hack here

Watching "The Matrix Revolutions" is an experience akin to watching somebody else play a video game: One can see how it might be exhilarating for the player, but there's little to keep anyone else engaged

This is basically what I said after seeing the second Matrix. Either I'm not as clever and original as I should be or it's just true and the movie kind of sucks... probably both huh?

Site is Growing

Eventually it will consume everything. I've been adding new links. I found some librarians who actually know how to keep a real blog (unlike yours truly.) Also, be sure to check out War in Context for the best reference source about our current imperial misadventure. More to come...

Flash From Electric Newspaper Boy!

Ultimate gift for Jeffrey is available now. All we need is a generous person with money.

Monday, November 03, 2003

I can't help it

But Fox really really sucks.. and I have to post about it. Don't worry, I won't go on and on... just go read this on Tom Tomorrow's site.

Still not Scared

It has been a long weekend. I think Halloween night can be summed up in two words for me: Stinky Chris. No, I don't want to elaborate. I will say this. Everyone looked pretty damn good. I just hope the pictures turn out OK. On the whole, I suppose the evening could have been scarier. Halloween day, by the way, was downright terrifying. I became embroiled in the.. well... embroiling task of officially notifying the state of Louisiana that I would be assuming ownership of my father's go-cart Tercel while simultaneously donating my tired old shouda-been-a-taxicab-Caprice to Nurse Mama. I hope they will be happy together. I start to get a little teary each time I see her drive away in it. The title change experience was not a problem. The lady was very friendly and helpful, although also posessed of some minor racial predjudices which she felt necessary to share with us. The difficulty arose when I was forced to hold several increasingly frustrating telephone conversations with apparently half simien individuals employed by GEICO ostensibly as customer service representatives. My modest request involved the transfer of my existing policy on the Caprice over to my new vehicle. About two hours, five phone calls, and three "computer crashes" later, we still weren't sure if my policy covered the correct vehicle, or had been transferred into my brother's name, or if I ever had a policy with GEICO. (I certainly know that I've been writing them checks for the last six or seven years and that someone has been cashing them.) Despite the confusion, the pleasant, though slightly racist, lady at the notary's office allowed us to complete the title transfers. So all's well that ends well.... or at least all ends. Right now I'm in the tech lab listening to a man mumble disturbing things to himself while he looks at pictures of female bodybuilders on the internet. I'll give him five minutes before I see if I can encourage him to find a new project.

Bonus Halloween Link: Amazon has been taken over by brain-eating zombies!