Recent dining dissappointments

Exceptionally bad food I've sampled lately:

• Dick and Jenny's

  Grilled Flank Steak with Jalapeño Bread Pudding, Cebollitas & a Black Bean Relish Drizzled with Avocado Cream

  This unnecessarily re-imagined fajita is garnished with a vaguely pickle-ish white "Avocodo Cream" that tastes more like olive milk than guacamole. The "Jalapeño Bread Pudding" has the texture and flavor of clumpy dry cornbread. Both of these items combine with the rather ordinary grilled meat to make the dish feel as unfinished as it is unappealing.
  
  Also from D&J's:

  Chocolate Silk Icebox Pie

  Sounds nice except that nothing about it tastes particularly of chocolate. The texture is light and fluffy... and pinkish brown. Maybe it tastes a bit like caramel but definitely not chocolate. It does taste quite a bit like salt, however.
  
  I must say, I was really let down by Dick and Jenny's altogether. It's so popular that the wait for a table can be over an hour and I seem to recall Rudolph talking it up quite a bit. But that weekend I spent less money at Rouse's on a week's worth of groceries than I did for one Olive Cream and Salt Pie meal at D&J's. But given all the raves I heard about it I'm willing to believe either that we ordered poorly or that it was just a bad night. I'm sure that eventually someone will talk me into giving it another try. Which is actually far more than I can say for....



• MAYAS Restaurant & Bar
  
  
  The Mayas website says:
  
  
  
  It turns out, however, that the cuisine is more accurately described as a half attempt at Latin-Asian fusion. The Spring Roll appetizer is served with a spinach salad doused in soy sauce, the entrees are presented with a side smear of... whatever that vaguely Asian orange chili dipping sauce is. But the weirdest bit of all is the complimentary basket of what appear to be fried won-tons served with a kind of spicy sweet and sour pepper jelly. The jelly also tasted oddly of cheese. I have no idea what it is but I came to call it Queso Fundido Jello.
  
  I actually liked the pork tamale. The chicken croquetas were pretty good... although the texture reminded me of stuffed potatoes. The sweet fried plantains were excellent... but there were only two.
  
  As for the entrees, I've never tasted a more flavorless paella. The seafood portion was perfectly generous but the seasoning didn't seem to go far beyond the salt left over from those creatures' former habitats.... and, of course, the bright orange chili sauce smear on the side of the plate. The Ropa Vieja was good enough but honestly ordered only because the Lechon-Roasted Pork was sold out and this substitute came with a side of plantains.
  
  It's not every day that I'm willing to turn down flan... but I didn't want to chance dessert at this place. I was afraid it might come topped with fortune cookies.

The Mayas excursion was sort of an accident anyway... the result of discovering at the door that Juan's is closed for renovations. But if you're looking for Latin/Carribean food on Magazine Street, by all means try Baru instead. I've been there at least four times over the past six months and on every occasion it has exceeded expectations in one way or another. Plus... nothing is served with Queso Jello.

Update: Following Oyster's hint in the comments below, I tracked down this similarly unimpressed review of Maya's from the Gambit blog. The reviewer even ordered the same entrees as we did on our visit.