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Friday, January 11, 2008

Now they've gone too far

Previously we've half-smilingly derided the impossibly white people of Jefferson Parish and their continuing efforts to perpetuate a myth that Carnival in New Orleans is somehow not a "family-friendly" event. In order to be disabused of such a misconception, one need only take the time to observe the parade routes of New Orleans during the parading season to find neighbors and families (often families with small children) enjoying the sights and tastes and smells of Carnival. But such is the manner of most tourists or impossibly white people from Jefferson Parish; not to observe things.

Instead, the impossibly white people of Jefferson Parish have taken it upon themselves to fill the imaginary need for "family friendly" events during the Carnival season. Thus the impossibly white people of Jefferson Parish are presenting the second annual "Family Gras" (literally "Fat Family")a three-day Mardi-Gras-themed concert event held in the beautiful and undoubtedly "family friendly" environs of Metairie and Gretna featuring the musical stylings of such "family friendly" acts as Billy Ray Cyrus, Taylor Swift, the Bangles and Kansas.

Of course, since this is the second year the impossibly white people of Jefferson Parish have graced us with these festivities, longtime readers will note that the subject has already been covered ad-nauseum and will wonder why we feel the need to even touch on this unpleasantness at all this time around.

Well I have good reason to bring it up today, and it is this. In light of my decided anti-Family Gras sentiment, I find it most disturbing that the Times-Picayune has chosen to associate my name with these events in today's headline. Worse than that, the editors there have made this libelous association through the employment of a particularly sensitive epithet. "Jeff Gras" (literally "Fat Jeff") is not only an uncharitable description of my temporary state of post-holiday mild chunkiness, it is also a very cheap shot. I demand a retraction.

Is there any King Cake left?

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