Turns out, as surprisingly good as that first visit was, this one was just as disappointing. I don't meant to be too hard on the place. There were extenuating circumstances. The flooding from Ike and Gustav had affected the availability of fresh oysters and crabmeat which limited the menu quite a bit. And it's never easy to handle such an obnoxious and drunken party of eleven... especially when it lingers well after closing time. The service staff handled this challenge beautifully. The food didn't come through quite as well.... or at least, my choices didn't live up to expectations. Here are some of those choices. (Copying from the NOLA menu)
Miss Hay's Stuffed Chicken Wings with Homemade Hoisin Dipping SauceThe wait staff could not have recommended this more highly. However, it could not have tasted more like an order of shrimp toast from Hot Wok. Not that there's a whole lot wrong with that. I was just disappointed since Menckles had ordered the..
Prince Edward Island Mussels in a Garlic-Chardonnay Broth with Foccaccia Bread(For some reason this is now only on the lunch menu) Admittedly, it's hard to go wrong with steamed mussels. These did not go wrong and she enjoyed them very much. Meanwhile I was left to live with my decision to take a chance with the chicken wings. Not saying I didn't eat them. I like Chinese take out as much as the next guy.
Blackberry Stout Glazed Hickory Smoked St. Louis Ribs with Orecchiette Pasta-Brie Cream "Mac & Cheese" and Honey Baked White Beans
The sauce was sweet and peppery and it was satisfying to blend it with the creamy pasta. I'm also noticing that white beans are becoming a hip side dish as of late. I've seen them offered on four different menus over the past few months. (My favorite version of this was a tomatoey white bean and shrimp soup I had at Cochon back in July.) Here they served to further the "dressed up BBQ" gimmick of this dish which wouldn't have been as tiresome a thing if the ribs had not been so tough and overcooked. My fingers got all sticky from eating this. It wasn't worth the mess. Especially since r was enjoying the...
Garlic Crusted Texas Redfish Cooked in the Wood Burning Oven with Brabant Potatoes, Wild Mushrooms, Bacon and Sauce Beurre RougeAs a result of my one bite sample of this fish, I am doomed to hate myself forever for ordering those ribs. I usually know better than to pass on a decent looking grilled redfish. But, since the crabmeat and oysters had been 86ed, I had decided to stay away from the seafood altogether with obvious unsatisfactory results.
And so the results of my two visits to NOLA have been mixed. The first experience was outstanding. The second was mildly disappointing... although it may have been my fault for ordering poorly. We'll have to give it another shot sometime during the next four years. After much drinking and shouting nonsense across the table at one another, (Did you know that "flowtion" is a word? It is if you need a quick rhyme for ocean and are stupid.) we moved the party to a local drinking establishment for more stupidity.
There it was learned for the fifty-thousandth time in human history that if one does choose to talk politics drunkenly, one should not drunkenly talk politics with a drunken person who is clearly not listening to you. Especially if the drunken person clearly not listening to you is a "doing-very-important-things" type who tells you that you are THE person to blame for everything wrong with Louisiana since you a) are white and b) harbor some fondness for Louisiana progressive politicians such as Huey Long. Especially if the drunken person clearly not listening to you proceeds to sucker punch a friend of yours who happens to be roughly one third her size.
As momentarily amusing as learning these things for the fifty-thousandth time can be, the very fact that they have been learned fifty-thousand times says something about how one is probably getting too old to amuse oneself in this fashion. So once everything calmed down, we relocated to yet another local drinking establishment and learned for the fifty-thousandth time that we are probably getting too old to stay out until 5:00 AM anymore as well. At least, Goldschmidt has some eventful memories to bring with her to Japan... if she remembers enough of the evening clearly.
Since some of you may have guessed by now that this is your weekly Saints round-up post, you may wonder why you have been made to suffer through these sad diversions on dining and douchebaggery. There is a very good reason and it is this. As we lay on the couch Sunday in our hungover haze watching the Saints go down to the Washington Redskins, it occurred to us that Saints tight end Jeremy Shockey
reminds us a great deal of Food Network star Guy Fieri.
And nobody brings the worlds of dining and douchebaggery together like Guy Fieri. A bit too fat to be a part-time surfing instructor, not quite hardy enough to be a roadie/bouncer for Bon Jovi, Fieri has found his niche getting paid to drive all over the country eating chili-cheese fries on television. I'm not saying I wouldn't do that myself if the opportunity came along, but it's clearly the frosted hair that landed him the gig and... well even I would never stoop that low.
Fieri, whose "look" is basically that of an anthropomorphic Mountain Dew ad with a cholesterol problem, was best distilled here by Anthony Bordain.
Guy Fieri… did you ever see the Simpsons episode where it’s decided that Itchy and Scratchy need a sidekick? So a committee gets together and they invent one called Poochie…. Guy Fieri kind of looks like he’s been designed by committee.
And so by the transitive property of general douche-hood, Jeremy Shockey will henceforth be referred to in this space as Poochie.
Saints-Redskins (all game photos once again stolen directly from NOLA.com... which is not to be confused in any way with NOLA restaurant):
- Pants factor: Based on our experience with a long term trend holding that the Saints tend to perform better under Sean Payton while wearing their traditional gold pants than they do in the black bicycle tights, we are tracking the pants factor on a game by game basis this year.
An argument could be made, however, that the Saints were affected more by wearing their black jerseys in the hot weather than by the more nebulous pants factor this week. Game commenters mentioned the heat several times noting that this or that Saint was getting extra time on the sideline recuperating. Deuce McAllister who was not expected to play in this game was forced to take a few snaps in order to relieve the overheated Frenchy Thomas. We understand that Poochie needed IV fluids at halftime.
The Redskins usually wear white jerseys at home. But more often than not, they pair this with burgundy (BURgundy not bruGUNdy) colored pants. Sunday they went with an all-white look which may have made a major difference for them. Still fresh, Washington rallied for 14 unanswered points in the fourth quarter while the overheated Saints were still trying to catch their breath.
Still we can't excuse away the fact that the Saints wore gold pants and lost. They are now 1-1 on the season while properly panted.
Redskins QB Jason Campbell wears all white after Labor Day and gets away with it - Poochie helped put the Saints in the hole early and did nothing to help them climb out of it. His fumble killed a promising drive on the Saints first possession of the game setting up a Washington field goal and their first lead of the day. On the Saints' very next possession, Drew Brees aimed a pass at Poochie which doinked off of the tight end's hands and into the arms of a defender. The Redskins capitalized on this turnover with another field goal. A few minutes into the second quarter, the score was Poochie 6 Saints 0.
Here we see the ball squirt through Poochie's extra-greasy fingers. Lay off the grilled cheese for once, Poochie! - The Redskins' kicker is named Shaun Suisham. (Pronounced Sweeshum) A name like that generally bodes ill in the game of football. Suisham missed two makeable field goal attempts. Lucky for him, they didn't affect the outcome and he lives to Sweesh another day.
- The Saints got their asses kicked physically in this one. On both offense and defense, the Saints found themselves (as they so often have in the Soupy Payton era) utterly out-muscled. Washington out-gained the Saints on the ground 149 yards to 55 while dominating the time of possession 34:14 to 25:46.
While the Saints are probably embarrassed that Clinton Portis steamrolled them for 96 yards and 2 touchdowns, I'm feeling slightly less bad since he started on my fantasy team this week. Based on what we've seen so far, I may be in the market to acquire future Saints opponents as the season develops.
Meanwhile the Saints' rushing game was pathetic. Bush and Frenchy combined for another underwhelming 2.2 yards per carry. Frenchy was stacked up on a crucial third down and one. The shortcomings of Reggie Bush as a running back are just not worth discussing anymore. While most fans are expecting the situation to improve by the mere insertion of Deuce McAllister into the lineup, we are not so optimistic. Sean Payton has built a wimpy finesse offense in a game that is still most often decided by brute force. The acquisition of Poochie was supposed bring some much-needed toughness to this outfit. So far, Poochie fits right in with the rest of the Wimpys out there. Must be the cheeseburgers.
Poochie will gladly pay us Tuesday - Congratulations to Robert Meachem for his first touchdown reception as a Saint... only about one year late. Not bad, buddy.
Funny thing is, some fans think Meachem was open because the Redskins were busy covering Poochie - Congratulations also to Santana Moss for accomplishing in Week 2 what the Saints were determined that Joey Galloway would not in Week 1. Moss proved that the Saints defense is every bit as susceptible to the big play this year as it was last year. Moss caught 7 passes for 164 yards and contributed a big 27 yard rushing play on an end-around. And, of course, he beat rookie DB Tracy Porter for the 67 yard game-winning score.
Kind of makes you wish Jason David had been in there. - The Hire-Me-As-Your-Scouting-Director moment of the week: Just this evening, as I scramble to complete this overdue post, I check NOLA.com to find an article by Reggie Bush apologist Jeff Duncan which sort of sugarcoats the fact of Bush's massive failure as a pro athlete thus far. There's a lot in this article that I may return to but for our purposes here, I'll highlight this one bit.
Of the masses who make a living analyzing the NFL, (NFL analyst Michael) Lombardi is the most outspoken critic of Bush. Not of his talent, which he believes is special, but of his effectiveness as an every-down runner.
Bush reminds Lombardi of Eric Metcalf, a similarly skilled scatback he selected for Cleveland with the No.¤13 overall pick in the 1989 NFL draft. Metcalf's numbers are remarkably similar to Bush's. In his 12-year career, Metcalf returned 12 punts and kickoffs for touchdowns, twice rushed for more than 600 yards in a season and in 1995 caught 104 passes.
Yet, Metcalf's career average on 630 rushes was 3.8 yards a carry. Bush averages 3.6 yards a carry.
And now, for kicks, let's flash back to something I wrote at the end of last season.This offseason, we'd like to see a few things happen. First, if Reggie Bush has to come back, perhaps he'll work on dating fewer C-list celebrities this summer and start watching film of former Brown-Falcon-Charger Eric Metcalf. Metcalf entered the league as a running back. But his slim body and finesse running style suited him more to the receiver position as a pro where he excelled after making the move. Bush has similar talents to Metcalf and has already demonstrated that he contributes the most to the Saints' offense when lined up as a wideout. If Pierre Thomas is going to get more playing time, and especially if Deuce can come back at all, Coach Soupy should consider making this move.
NFL player personnel departments, you know where to find me. - Kicking game is one third of football: While the offense and defense were getting their asses handed to them by the far more physical Redskins all day, the Saints remained in the game thanks to their near dominance on special teams. Almost everything went right for New Orleans in the kicking game. The coverage teams limited the dangerous return tandem of Rock Carwright and Antwaan Randle-El. Josh Bullocks forced a Randle-El fumble on punt coverage. Martin Gramatica nailed a 49 yard field goal to put the Saints ahead at halftime. And, of course, Bush contributed a (very Metcalf-like) punt return for a touchdown that put the Saints (we thought) comfortably ahead at the end of the third quarter. Although, as Oyster has become fond of saying, "an un-alloyed Reggie Bush highlight is a very rare thing." While Bush's taunting penalty incurred on that punt return may seem like a ticky-tacky thing, recall that Bush was flagged for the very same thing at a crucial moment in the NFC Championship game two years ago in Chicago. Whatever you think of the call or the rule, Bush should know better than to test that particular boundary by now.
In the fourth quarter, Steve Weatherford badly shanked two punts helping to set up Washington scoring drives. But apart from that black mark, the Saints special teams played an outstanding game. There was talk afterward that the otherwise outplayed Saints nearly "stole" this one. The all-around superior play in the kicking game is what got them so close.
Could be he was just pointing at his teammate on the sideline and thinking "Hey that guy looks a lot like Poochie!"
This afternoon, some yahoo called in to WWL screaming that the Saints REALLY NEED to run Deuce "35 times, at least" this Sunday afternoon in Denver or else they've blown it for the year. Do football fans in this town have trouble even remembering one season into the past? If the Saints lose Sunday (which most of us expect they certainly will) they will be 1-2. No one who watched them start 0-4 in 2007 and almost sneak into the playoffs anyway, can possibly be ready to throw in the towel at that point.
If you want to worry about something, Saints fans, try this. With Poochie and his all-grease-and-cheese diet around as an example, the Saints may not be in danger of losing football games so much as gaining unsightly pounds. Here we are just coming in to Week 3 and some of these guys are already starting to chunk up on us. We're looking at you, Coach Soupy.
If the Saints don't find a way to restore team discipline fast, the next sucker punch might get them right in the soft spot.
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