Okay but what if I just want to mute the crime?

This seems like a fantastic idea. 

NEW ORLEANS -- The New Orleans Police Department introduced a new system Wednesday that allows residents to report certain crimes online.

Now, residents can reports crimes like property damage, lost property, thefts, and additions to existing cases without having to call or wait for a police officer to make a report. There is also an option to download police reports for free.

Overreacting to everyday annoyances has never been easier. Soon we will have all the data on everyone's neighborhood lawn maintenance disputes in one convenient place. Can they sell that to creditors, maybe? Should solve some budgetary problems that way.  What about partnering with NextDoor? The platform for this already exists over there.