Thursday, September 30, 2004

Collective Punishment

Another day in Iraq, another international law wantonly disregarded. Meanwhile, tonight the American electorate prepares to look past all of this foolishness and instead absorb the hard hitting analysis of who sweats and who sighs.

People, for crying out loud

I don't care how mean you are, I will not do your freaking fifth grader's homework for you!! Got that? Probably not.

Photoblogging moment of the morning

For the easily entertained, such as myself.

Click here.

Nice, Aaron.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

If it's evil, it's bound to be hip somewhere

Oooh someone please implant an RFID chip in my arm. Man that sounds like fun!

Are we supposed to be impressed

That the supposedly independent television networks have boldly refused to have their use of camera angles dictated by the Commission on Presidential Debates? Forgive me if I don't dance naked in the street. (It is only Wednesday after all) The fact remains that the debates have been rendered as inane and pointless as the conventions, the media coverage, the campaign itself for that matter. Do not expect any substantive confrontation, any competition of ideas, anything resembling an argument or a "debate", if you will. The rules won't allow it. Instead what you will see amounts to little more than a jointly produced campaign commercial for both candidates after which each will be declared "the winner" by his respective spin machine. It's all part of the bread and circus package which has replaced your democratic process. And, yes, I will watch. But only so I can play the drinking game.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004


NEW YORK (Reuters) - U.S. consumers may soon have to swallow more expensive coffee as soaring futures and rising costs from milk to fuel induce roasters to charge more for the steamy brew, industry participants said.

Looks like I'll just have to start snorting coke in the morning.

Fun Story of the Day

Know your audience.
NEW YORK (AP) -- The folks at Comedy Central were annoyed when Fox News Channel's Bill O'Reilly kept referring to "The Daily Show" audience as "stoned slackers."

So they did a little research. And guess whose audience is more educated?

Viewers of Jon Stewart's show are more likely to have completed four years of college than people who watch "The O'Reilly Factor," according to Nielsen Media Research.
Also of note is the deadpan humor of the CNN story writer who offers
Comedy Central had no statistics on how many people watch "The Daily Show" stoned.
Very Cute

Monday, September 27, 2004

Monday Morning Sports Page

If you're like me, and I know I am, you may be familiar with that special relief that comes at the first sign that your shaky but to this point successful effort to avoid spectacular failure is about to be exposed as the horrible fraud you always suspected it to be. It's really a kind of catharsis the way one moment can transform months, perhaps years, of tenuous hope into a clear path to certain doom. This is the kind of reprieve afforded a blindfolded boxer when he learns via impact the exact force and direction of the inevitable knockout blow. Hmmm maybe a blindfolded boxer is too hopeless. Imagine instead one who is accused of a murder he did not commit but who expects to be convicted due to overwhelming circumstantial evidence. Next, let us say that the accused did carry a degree of animosity toward the victim, not quite enough to wish him dead perhaps, but certainly enough to cause the accused to wonder to himself whether or not he does bear at least some guilt for the crime. In this case we can assume that our protagonist technically deserves to go free but is not confident of his prospects either practically or morally. Now if you can put yourself in this person's place at the moment the sentence is passed, then you know what I'm talking about.
And, of course, if you happen to be a Cubs fan, then you must have some inkling of where I might be going with this. The Cubs had their glorious moment of deflation delivered to them on Saturday when Chicago native Victor Diaz hit a game tying three run homer in the ninth inning which paved the way for the Mets' 4 to 3 victory which effectively ended the Cubs season. They may still have a 1/2 game lead in the NL wild card race but that home run was exactly the kind of transcendent moment that people just do not recover from. Believe me, I know what I'm talking about. Case in point, the stunned Cubs blew another one on Sunday. The Cubs continue to play out the pointless string tonight against Cincinnati.

Should the Cubs and their fans wish to avoid yet another episode of this too oft repeated drama, perhaps they could learn a thing or two from the Mississippi State Bulldogs who certainly managed to dull the pain of their 51-0 loss to LSU by eschewing any initial doubts as to the outcome. The easiest way to avoid disappointment is surely to have never possessed any hope to begin with, or as Homer Simpson might say, trying is the first step toward failure. Our prayers are now focused on the Tigers who are doubtlessly harboring illusions that await exploding at third ranked Georgia this weekend.

As for the most deluded bunch of all, don't think we don't see you, Saints fans, getting your hopes up just because you beat the NFL's worst head coach on Sunday, expecting big things out of Aaron Stecker in the coming weeks, watching literacy advocate Aaron Brooks come through in the clutch yet again, realizing that Joe Horn is really Superman, licking your chops at the prospect of facing hapless Arizona next week... see now even I'm doing it! Well knock it off. Fortuna's wheel will spin you and your no defense having team downward soon enough.

I'll end this short dissertation on the importance of knowing one's role in the universe with a line from my current happy reading diversion Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff by Christopher Moore in which the protagonist, a Jew, objects to what is implied by Taoist monks who are trying to teach him the importance of ignoring what is past or what is to come and simply living in the moment. His question, "Without the past where is the guilt? And without the future where is the dread? And without guilt and dread who am I?"

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Yup, it's the public

So it turns out that the guy using the phone claims to be trying to get the VA to give him his medication and is receiving "the runaround." According to this gentleman, he was struck in the head with a two by four whilst performing his duties in the service of his country which must have been a good forty plus years ago by the looks of him. Apparently, the evildoers on the other end of the phone are trying to force him to drive unnecessarily to Baton Rouge for his "head medicine." They are not going to win this battle, so he tells me, because he is "this close" to calling Bill Clinton. Also he has occupied the surface of a library table with paperwork which he believes will prove "more powerful than the atom bomb" once he releases it to "the media." Perhaps I can convince him to let me post it here on Lib Chron. It would be my first journalistic coup.

At the Ghetto Branch Today

Our library system regularly pulls staff from the larger branches to cover for the smaller branches on days when they are short. Because I work at a large regional branch, and because I don't complain much, I quite often find myself shipped to various parts of town for the day. I rarely mind this unless I'm busy with a big project or something. The branch I am subbing at today is pretty small and quiet until the after school crowd hits so the morning was pleasant. Also I am closer to the heart of the city so I got to spend my lunch hour milling about in the French Quarter which is refreshingly fun when one is sober. Right now, I'd like to call Consuela and find out if she wants something fun for dinner tonight but there is a patron here who has been monopolizing the one telephone in the building for forty five minutes. At least I get a short reprieve from this sort of thing.

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Iraq War Makes us Less Safe From Hurricanes

From the Times-Pic this morning
Levitan's proposed hurricane-safe public buildings would be unstaffed refuges and contain few amenities for those left behind to face potential floodwaters. But if levees are raised and floodgates are built to protect the city from catastrophic storm surge, they could be used as American Red Cross hurricane shelters. Such a plan is already being considered. An initial study of the feasibility of higher levees was completed earlier this year for Jefferson Parish, garnering enough information to recommend a second study that would estimate a price tag for building such a system for the metro area.

That second study would take about four years to complete and would cost about $4 million, said Army Corps of Engineers project manager Al Naomi. About $300,000 in federal money was proposed for the 2005 fiscal-year budget, and the state had agreed to match that amount.

But the cost of the Iraq war forced the Bush administration to order the New Orleans district office not to begin any new studies, and the 2005 budget no longer includes the needed money, he said.

Monday, September 20, 2004


Ever have one of those days wherein you just can't seem to make any progress no matter how much running you do? This is certainly one of those for me thanks mostly to coworkers who delight in installing spyware on office computers. The New Orleans Saints also figure to become very familiar with making no progress on the ground over the next five weeks. By the way, what the hell is a high ankle sprain?

Sunday, September 19, 2004

Note to Saints fans

I thought you might win six or seven games. If Deuce misses any significant amount of time, you won't win four. But you knew that already.

Note to Nick Saban

This quarterback rotation crap just ain't gonna cut it. By the way, what is the deal with all these missed extra points in college football this year? Is there some kind of new blindfold rule I wasn't aware of?

Note to Fox McKeithen

Next time you find yourself evaluating whether or not to postpone an election that falls on the weekend after a massive evacuation of the state's largest urban area, one excellent question to ask yourself would be, "Can my office deliver essential equipment such as voting machines to the polling locations before the election begins?" Because if you can't and you decide to hold the election anyway in order to prove your juvenile point about the evacuation being unnecessary, then you just end up creating a big mess.


To the 177,157 Louisianians who voted against the gay marriage ban in yesterday's elections and thereby proved yourselves not to be hateful paranoid pathetic fucknuts. As for the 618,974 of you who voted for the amendment, there is something really really wrong with you. Probably something having to do with being a bunch of hateful paranoid pathetic fucknuts.

Saturday, September 18, 2004

Internet filtering just plain sucks

If you don't believe me, just check out the new Maddox.

Quick Sports Section

Deuce McAllister called out the Saints coaches yesterday regarding the team's new one back offense. Offensive coordinator Mike McCarthy promised to run Deuce behind a fullback more often this week against San Francisco. (I will not be in attendance at this game so someone will have to tell me if it works or not.)

The Tigers are back in action today. Saban is planning to use both quarterbacks against Auburn. This is not unheard of in college football but it always makes me nervous. This will be a tight game. If the field is in decent condition, LSU has a good chance being the faster team on balance.

The Cubs have won five in a row. Undoubtedly Daisy will attempt to take credit for this when she starts posting again.

So what would happen

If we tried to hold an election two days after a huge evacuation of the state's most densely populated area? A big mess that's what. This morning, I understand that a Lakeview polling location was unable to open on time because the machines had not yet arrived. Some locations have been moved. Worst of all, without a strong New Orleans turnout, the dreaded Hate Amendment is sure to pass. If you need any help figuring out what to do, here is the La Sec of State's election page. Among the handy tools there are: If you can make it out today, please go vote.

Thursday, September 16, 2004

Hurricane hangover

Posting this a day late

This morning, much of my neighborhood was still boarded up. Many evacuees have not returned just yet so I imagine a lot of things will be closed today. Who ever heard of a hurricane without rain? We were unbelievably lucky this time. New Orleans is in a unique postition with respect to hurricanes due to the fact that we sit 6-9 feet below sea level and are surrouned by the Mississippi, Lake Pontchartrain and a vast swamp. The water that surrounds us is higher than we are. If a storm like Ivan were to hit us the way it hit coastal Alabama and Florida last night it would bring about an unimaginable disaster scenario. If you haven't done so yet, you should really read this article Oyster linked to. This spectre of complete annhilation is a contributing factor to the devil-may-care lifestyle for which our city is so famous. We grow up here with a fully developed healthy sense of the apocolyptic.
In this spirit, the locals who remained last night were out making the most of it. The 2PM curfew did little or nothing to deter sightseers. One common tactic was for folks to walk their dogs as a pretense for being outside. I live about five blocks uptown from Igor's so I walked down to find them open. There were more dogs there, some people had a beach ball, and one guy was wearing floaties. The police showed up, but it turned out they just wanted to order a hamburger.
This morning I went for a short walk. The wind had shaken loose some small branches, and on St. Charles Ave, also dislodged some of the beads left hanging in the trees from Mardi Gras. The beads and minor debris along the sidewalk left one with a sort of Ash Wednessday feeling. (The hangover also contributed much to this.) There was sun and a light breeze, a perfect day with which it seemed that God was promising to never again destroy the world via a moderate breeze and a light sprinkle or two. Again, we were really lucky this time, folks. Let's hope this is our last scare of the season.

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Louisiana: They may be trying to wash us away

... but they won't tonight. Of course, this could have been "the one." In Alabama, they are reporting 50 ft waves. The good news is it looks like we made it through another one. It turns out that Igor's is open despite the "curfew." I'm outta here folks.


I just noticed that, due to the inclement weather conditions in New Orleans, I inadvertently typed the phrase, "shelter of last result" in a post below. The problem has been corrected. If any more typos occur on this site during Hurricane Ivan, please report them directly to Entergy 1-800-9OUTAGE (1-800-968-8243).

Hurricane Awards (early nominations)

Image of the day: Here at Metroblogging New Orleans.

Mental image of the day: Floating balls of fire ants.

Looks like we're gonna be ok

Uptown is starting to get some wind but it's not even raining yet.. and we might not get much rain according to what they're saying on TV. Here is the 4PM forecast track. It would seem there is nothing left for me to do here except get drunk and start looting.

Sure is a perty hurricane idn't it?

Danger: Liquor supply low

I'm preparing to ride out Ivan and I'm stuck here with one bottle of Pinot Noir and two Bud Lights. The good news is my dial-up connection is much faster than usual. I wonder if this has anything to do with the city being deserted.

New Hurricane Threat: Turf Burn

The Mayor has just announced that the Superdome will be open as a shelter of last resort for "special needs" citizens, the indigent, and the elderly. Unfortunately they will still have to pay $9.00 for beer. (Ba-da-bum.) Oh wait, wait I've got another one! Exactly how is this different from when the Saints are playing? Ha! I kill me!

Oh for a digital camera

I just spent a few minutes breaking curfew on my bicycle getting pictures of the Uptown New Orleans ghost town situation with my $5.00 disposable camera. My local Walgreens is closed for some reason so I won't be able to post the photos unitl nobody cares about this anymore. Meanwhile, WWLTV has a place where you can share your hurricane photos if you happen to be more technologically advanced than I am.

Also: recap of my morning misadventure with the family here.

Back in NO

So at 7:00 this morning, we almost panicked. Or.. we did panic and then got over it. Dad and his parents and my brother and a cat a dog and a parrot named Miracle loaded into three cars and took off for higher ground. The objective was my Mom's house in Nashville, TN and its promise of free lodging so, unlike the rest of the metro area, we headed east toward Slidell and then north on I-59. There was NO PROBLEM getting out of the city at this time. Unlike the thousands of poor souls on I-10 West who are at this moment still stuck near Baton Rouge, we were able to get as far as Hattiesburg, MS before the 10:00 AM advisory convinced us it was safe to come back home. I'm at Dad's house right now and I have an hour to get back to my place before the 2:00 PM curfew. More to come.

Meanwhile: It's finally happened! The Saints really did move to San Antonio!

Monday, September 13, 2004

Hurricane Update

As of 6:45pm Monday here is the situation for Tuesday.

St. Bernard Parish: Voluntary evacuation issued. Public Schools Closed.

Plaquemines Parish: Voluntary evacutaion issued. Public Schools Closed.

Jefferson Parish:
Voluntary Evacuation issued. Public Schools Closed.

Orleans Parish: Voluntary evacuation issued. New Orleans Public Schools closed. New Orleans Public Library: Open regular hours!!

Getting Nervous

So Ivan is starting to get all freaky on us. Anybody got any ideas?

Need an outrage fix?

The new Project Censored is out. The next person who complains about the "liberal media" to me gets a big fat punch in the mouth. (figuratively speaking)

Saturday, September 11, 2004

Memos are likely real

So sayeth this Globe report.

Ok here we go. A great big Saints post

In this part of the world, the arrival of late summer and early autumn engenders a great deal of optimistic forward looking type thinking among the local citizenry. Much of this phenomenon is meteorological in origin. By this point in the year, New Orleanians have been sweating and suffering and shelling out for Clinton Syndrome inducing energy bills for a good four or five months. Summer in New Orleans is brutal and although these conditions will not actually improve for another two months (or sometimes longer) there is something about that "ber" on the end of the current month that breaks the sultry static of the season and reminds us that things do change, sometimes even for the better.

This annual infusion of optimism is a palpable event in New Orleans and its effects are felt in numerous varied spheres of daily experience generating all sorts of ridiculous expectations for future events. Case in point: Look at all the nutty folks who actually expect the New Orleans Saints to win more than they lose this year. The Times-Picayune's Jeff Duncan has them 10-6. Prominent Louisiana blogger, Ricky Prado predicts an astonishing 11-5. (another of his commenters has an NFC championship appearance.) An overwhelming number of callers to the Buddy D show, posters to those stupid forums and message boards, and random assholes I run into on the street have all gone loopy with autumn optimism. Obviously some antidote to this fall fever is required. Who then could be better to provide it than a guy still suffering the summery effects of a semi-functional air conditioner.

Let me preface these remarks by stating that this particular version of the New Orleans Saints (since 2000) is, for me, perhaps the most likeable group the franchise has ever produced. And this is coming from someone who as a teenager hung on every moment of the glorious '87-'93 era. Glory is, of course, relative since those teams did not win a single one of their four playoff appearances. But these were the first winning teams in Saints history which, improbably, featured a starting quarterback, a leading rusher, and a leading receiver who were all Louisiana products. Now that is hard to compete with. And yet, there were things about those teams which I absolutely hated. Coach Jim Mora and General Manager Jim Finks were (and in many ways still are) folk heroes of a sort. I couldn't stand either one of them. They carried themselves and treated their players and the local press with that brand of arrogance and condescension which usually derives directly from a need to hide an underlying incompetence. (Sound familiar, Mr. President?) Mora is the NFL's all time underachiever as a coach. It isn't hard to make a case that no coach has accomplished less with more talent than he. And Finks unforgivably ruined the Saints' best chance to win a championship, when he forced Bobby Hebert to sit out the 1990 season in a contract dispute and then added insult to injury by trading for Steve Walsh.

Could Hebert have brought New Orleans a Superbowl in 1990? The world will never know.

But we're not here to think about what could have been. The current group of Saints has much to recommend it (including an actual playoff victory) and includes no one who approaches the supreme jerkdom of Mora or Finks. Unfortunately they are also missing something else those earlier teams had in abundance; the ability to play defense. Not to be too flip here but, in football, that is kind of important. This year, the Saints plan to start a rookie at middle linebacker and a 34 year old man at one corner. These are not good signs. The defensive line should be serviceable. It will have to be better than that to hide the horrors lining up behind it. The offense should score points and could be among the best in the league if literacy advocate Aaron Brooks finally comes into his own. On the other hand, things can go downhill in a hurry if Deuce McAllister gets hurt.

Brooks needs to read the defense if he wants to pass the test this season. Is 2004 a make or break year?

In order to make this season a success in New Orleans, all of the following things need to happen: 1) Deuce needs to stay healthy. 2) The defense must overachieve spectacularly 3) Brooks, who is adequate, still needs to make a giant leap forward to realize his potential. 4) The slumlord needs to fix my a/c. One of these four things may happen. Certainly, all four will not. The way I see it, this adds up to an underwhelming 6 or 7 win season for the home team.

More predictions: Take heart, Saints fans. I suck suck suck at this. Nothing I forsee ever materializes in reality. For example, my primary fantasy team, The Portly Gentlemen, is already suffering due to my decision to start Marcus Pollard over Randy McMichael this weekend. So with that in mind, I've got the Eagles and Titans in the Superbowl this year. And, of course, the Saints will get off on the wrong foot against the Seahawks 24-14.

Note: Due to circumstances beyond my control, I will not be in attendance at Sunday's Saints/Seahawks contest.

Friday, September 10, 2004

Some notes on the "forgery" issue

First: The White House did not question the authenticity of these documents when CBS presented them.

Second: It's really disgusting to know ahead of time how this is going to play out. Something along the lines of, "Questions surround authenticity of documents. Can we know the truth? Experts in disagreement." For the Bush people, this is all they really need to put this issue to bed politically.

Third: An enterprising Kos poster has gone through the complaints about these documents and convincingly debunked each one. Unfortunately, the public's attention span is not long enough to deal with anything that goes past "Experts in disagreement."

Thursday, September 09, 2004

You'd think we could build three football stadiums

According to a study from the Massachusetts Taxpayers Foundation, denizens of the Gret Stet of Louisiana pay $111.26 in state taxes per $1000.00 in income. This places Louisiana 10th nationwide and far above any other Southern state. What is really telling here is that when the results are sorted by sales and excise taxes only, we shoot all the way up to number 2. Only Hawaii's tax system leans (slightly) more heavily on the poor than the birthplace of Huey Long and the "Share our Wealth" movement. Tragic.

There is still time

For you to check out Nathan Newman's Labor Day mega post, which I wanted to link to a few days ago.. but there were Blogger issues. Newman is also part of the new Labor Blog which also merits watching.

He Said She Said

Ready made, simplistic media framing. Let's see how quickly they pick up on this.

Dick Cheney: "Go Fuck yourself."

Teresa Heinz Kerry: "Shove it."

Dick Cheney: "If you are against us you are with the terrorists."

Teresa Heinz Kerry: "If you are against us you are an idiot."

Question of the Day

By now, I'm sure you all know that the records show that the President of the United States, while serving in the National Guard, disobeyed a direct order and refused to show up for a physical examination. This, itself is a violation of the law, but beyond that, more journalists need to start asking why he would do this.
Josh Marshall:
And here we get down to a specific and perhaps touchy point. Why wouldn't Bush show up for that physical? An Air Force pilot's physical is a bigger deal than the one civilians get on a routine basis. But still, it's not that big a deal. Even if he didn't think it was necessary, why disobey a direct order to get around it?

And on this point let me make a more general suggestion. The White House's story has changed many, many times on the Guard matter. And they've been careful -- and wisely so -- to avoid make definitive statements that would limit their room for maneuver after future revelations.
More to come, perhaps? Should we ask Kitty Kelley?

NY Times Ed Today

What's totally unacceptable is to tell the American people that the mere act of voting for your opponent opens the door to a terrorist attack. For Mr. Cheney to suggest that is flat wrong. There was a time in this country when elected officials knew how to separate the position from the person. The American people, we're sure, would like to return to it.

Wow. Shocking

Look, just go read everything Atrios has posted today. Start here and go down.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Good God, Not Again!

Poor Florida can't catch a break, it would seem. Someday, some intolerable hack historian will make hundreds of thousands of dollars selling some drivel he has produced about the Presidential Election Debacle of 2004 which not only precipitated the demise of the republic but also hinged on a second consecutive spectacular mess/fraud in Florida. Our historian will waste an entire chapter or two setting the stage for his epic and lucrative tale by droning on about the eerily portentous series of angry hurricanes which struck the state just months before the cataclysmic election. And I will set my copy of this work on my nightstand and think back wistfully upon these long lost salad days regretting only that Hurricane Ivan did not turn westward and mercifully submerge the fair city of New Orleans and its blessed inhabitants who would then never have lived to face the horror of this author's trite bullshit.

Why hasn't anything been done about this yet?

WASHINGTON, Sept. 7 (UPI) -- A startling pattern of violence and suicide by America's most elite soldiers has followed their use of a controversial anti-malaria drug, an investigation by United Press International and CNN has found.
More here

Today's most popular reference question

A great number of the local school children have received an assignment which requires them to acquire one work of fiction. I know nothing else about this assignment other than it has prompted every pre-teen I have seen this afternoon to ask this question, "Y'all got any books on fiction?"

Hello? Is this thing on?

If you can read this, it means that Blogger doesn't hate my existence exactly, just one particular post I've been trying to squeeze out all night. Will try again tomorrow.

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Welcome Back.. I think... Blogger keeps eating this post

So now that labor day is over with, what could possibly be next? Well, let's see, there does seem to be a certain swelling of enthusiasm for news of plastic clad fat people running about and tackling one another. Could it really be football season already? If so, someone should tell the LSU Tigers because if we were to judge by Saturday's performance vs Oregon Statewe would have to assume that the bell has not quite yet rung for them. Fortunately for Tiger fans (avert your eyes, Ricky) God, as usual, was on their side. How else do you explain a game tying 60 plus yard drive led by a freshman quarterback with less than two minutes left to play? Or how a team who fumbled the opening kickoff, shanked a punt and missed two field goals ended up winning the game? Or, well, you just can't explain what happened to this poor guy. But somehow I don't think it takes too much imagination on the part of Louisiana football fans at least to relate.

JaMarcus Russell (T-P photo): A star is born?

Other Observations:
  • Marcus Randall seems like a nice guy and it's real sweet of him to have hung around for five years but he is not going to be the starting quarterback this year. Say what you will about the muddy field conditions, but Randall just did not look poised. On several plays when LSU lined up in shotgun formation, he seemed to have the happy feet syndrome going before the ball was even snapped. This stood in stark contrast to the coolness with which JaMarcus Russell comported himself after entering the game under difficult circumstances. Russell is the proverbial genie who cannot be put back in the bottle. Both QBs will play next week against Arkansas State's jayvee squad, but Russell should start against Auburn.

  • The Tigers went into this one with a stable full of highly touted yet unproven receivers. At least Dwayne Bowe looks like the real thing.

  • The above is good because Joseph Addai can't catch.

  • The Tigers need to learn run the ball, settle on a quarterback, and quit making dumb mistakes.

  • All of the above is OK because, as we said before, the Lord is mighty and strikes down the enemies of the righteous.

Saturday, September 04, 2004

Tracking Tigers vs Chasing Shadows

I submitted the following letter to the T-P this morning. Perhaps it is too cute?

There's nothing like a beautiful early New Orleans Saturday morning jog along St. Charles Avenue, listening to NPR on the radio headphones, to open the mind to metaphor and musings.

Today's excursion featured a brief interview with Fort Polk's commandant regarding the ongoing and week-long hunt for a very elusive Bengal tiger. The old saying, "a Bengal tiger sees you a hundred times before you see it," was offered to
illuminate the difficulty of tracking and subduing the wily beast. What a scenario: a lone predator stalking and being stalked - for a while now - in the heart of a full army complement and encampment. From somewhere comes the irresistible name Osama Ben(gal) Tiger.

Importantly, there are obvious and, apparently for some, not so obvious differences.

Both are indicated by noting that this search is dedicated to a capture, not a kill; but it will doubtless succeed without injury to the innocent, because at least it is honestly aimed at the real predator, and not some unrelated maneuver for other purposes in a nearby state.

It is certainly not my intention

To even begin to appear to gloat about any of this. Because, of course, I am all too familiar with the cruelty of Fortuna's wheel. On the other hand, it is pretty damn funny.

Thursday, September 02, 2004

Bush Makes His Case

George W Bush Accepting the Republican Nomination for President:

I believe every child can learn, and every school must teach - so we passed the most important federal education reform in history. Because we acted, children are making sustained progress in reading and math, America's schools are getting better, and nothing will hold us back.

I believe we have a moral responsibility to honor America's seniors.

Economy is growing and creating jobs

Our Nation's founding commitment is still our deepest commitment: In our world, and here at home, we will extend the frontiers of freedom.

To create jobs, my plan will encourage investment and expansion by restraining federal spending, reducing regulation, and making tax relief permanent.

And we must protect small business owners and workers from the explosion of frivolous lawsuits that threaten jobs across America.

Another priority in a new term will be to help workers take advantage of the expanding economy to find better, higher-paying jobs. In this time of change, many workers want to go back to school to learn different or higher-level skills. So we will double the number of people served by our principal job training program and increase funding for community colleges.

We will offer a tax credit to encourage small businesses and their employees to set up health savings accounts, and provide direct help for low-income Americans to purchase them.

To make health care more affordable and accessible, we must pass medical liability reform now.

Because the union of a man and woman deserves an honored place in our society, I support the protection of marriage against activist judges. And I will continue to appoint federal judges who know the difference between personal opinion and the strict interpretation of the law.

Today, the government of a free Afghanistan is fighting terror, Pakistan is capturing terrorist leaders, Saudi Arabia is making raids and arrests, Libya is dismantling its weapons programs, the army of a free Iraq is fighting for freedom, and more than three-quarters of al-Qaida's key members and associates have been detained or killed. We have led, many have joined, and America and the world are safer.

Despite ongoing acts of violence, Iraq now has a strong Prime Minister, a national council, and national elections are scheduled for January.

We will help new leaders to train their armies, and move toward elections, and get on the path of stability and democracy as quickly as possible.

Fortunately, we had a resolute president named Truman, who with the American people persevered, knowing that a new democracy at the center of Europe would lead to stability and peace.

It's about freaking time!!

Kerry today
"I'm not going to have my commitment to defend this country questioned by those who refused to serve when they could have and by those who have misled the nation into Iraq," Kerry said in prepared remarks issued as the Republican was poised to accept his party's nomination for a second term.
Much much more of this is needed.
via: atrios

Sir, I demand satisfaction

Is it some weird dream of mine or has the RNC devolved into a bizzare Simpsons episode? First we get a catch phrase and movie reference filled speech by McBain, and now a crusty old Southern relic has actually challenged Chris Matthews (who, admittedly, can be a pain in the butt) to a duel.

Between this and the twins, I can't imagine what could possibly top these performances. Oh that's right, we haven't heard from this guy yet. Stay tuned.

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Propaganda Tool of the Day

Convention Jockeys. Sort of the RNC's version of VNRs in real time. Blech!

via: Derelection 2004, The brand-spanking new election news digest from Cursor.

Actual Reference Questions from Actual People

"I read an article about Elvis Presley where he said he had a book called The Shroud of Turin. It was about Jesus and he said it changed his life. Do y'all have that book up in here?"

Look, people, don't get too cocky about this

Kurtz asks, "What were they thinking?" and then pretty much answers his own question.
(Quoting the LA Times reaction) "The strategy Tuesday, apparently, was to have sisters Jenna and Barbara humanize and soften the grim-faced Politburo image that dogs the Bush-Cheney campaign, which hasn't made much of an effort to court those young Americans who call it a good day if they've remembered to TiVo 'The Simple Life.' So here they were, girlie and giggly and glammed-up (Jenna in some kind of Juicy couture-looking track suit top over white pants, Barbara in a black cocktail dress)."
That's exactly who they are appealing to.. and it works. It fits perfectly with the image the President clearly intends to project to the public. The President is a C student with little or no intellectual curiosity and poor command of the English language, but he's presumably a "likeable straight shooter." This image has stuck with the public, and it is a winning image. It only follows that his daughters assume the role of vaccuous party girls who "aren't very political." Look around, people. This, unfortunately, is most of America in all its inane, mindless, hypocritical glory. Poke all the fun you want at the Bush girls' giggling but don't think for a second that it isn't calculated.

Happy Birthday, Timshel

The Louisiana Blog of record.

The Battle of the Library

900 arrested in New York.

Did I mention I'm broke?

Which is a shame becaue Macs are cool.